Finally, it's time for elimination. I say just axe all three and go straight to the reunion show. I've been hankering for a glimpse of DJ Lady Tribe. Taya looks insane and has made a really poor fabric choice, though I guess you could argue that the wrinkles on her white satin mirror the wrinkles in her friendship with Mindy, and the wrinkles on her actually 46 year-old face. Anyway, Bret is concerned that Jamie may not be looking for a serious relationship. He is also concerned that Taya might be there not only for love, but also for business. And he's concerned that Mindy has the funk. Nonetheless, Mindy is first to get a pass. Bret asks if she feels that she's there for the right reason and is open enough to want to find love. Mindy says that she's there for real. She'll gnaw on Bret's log...with love. And then, it's time for what Bret says is the hardest decision he's ever had to make. Mindy notes that Taya stares at the floor the entire time, most likely trying to drum up some sad emotions by thinking of a dead pet so she can cry on cue when Bret calls her. But then Bret calls Jamie. Devastation for Taya! Or not. Because Jamie's eliminated. Bret is truly looking for a serious relationship at this point in his life, and there's no way he can let Taya go while knowing that Jamie just wants to party all the time, party all the time, party all the time. That's totally not at all what Jamie was saying, but the girl should count her blessings that her tour is ending here. Jaime exit interviews that she came there for love, and got dumped on TV by a guy with a braided wig. She hopes that Bret will hook her up with some Poison tickets at the very least.
Bret then calls Taya to him. He says that both she and Mindy are here for the right reason. Taya tearfully agrees to stay on the tour and continue to rock Bret's world. And then they make out, and this episode I have seen way more of Bret's tongue than should be legal.
Next week: season finale! Dominican Republic! Dancing lessons! Adventure! And a RING!