Okay, anyway. So Bret plays some of the song for Jes, who seems impressed, then sits with her. He wants to try to get to know her and have the walls come down. He talks about his youth and the early days of Poison, when they pulled out of Mechanicsburg, Pennsylvania in an old rickety van. He tells her that rock n' roll has killed most of his relationships, and so he's built a guard around his heart. And wrote "Every Rose Has Its Thorn," God WE KNOW! Jes tells Bret that she can't say she's ever been in love, and adds that her last boyfriend cheated on her with her best friend. Oooh, bad taste in men AND friends. That's rough. Overall, though, she's feeling comfortable with Bret and is ready to let her guard down. From that point on, the date is awesome. They talk, they laugh, the song keeps playing, and Bret plants a big kiss on her. Jes says that they had both an emotional and physical connection, and really clicked. And no one had to get drunk or get a tattoo or have a foursome or anything! Ah, love.

The next morning, Bret yells for Heather. Turns out he got her letter, which told him all the dirt on all the girls, and it pissed him off. Heather wonders how the hell she's in trouble when she was just trying to protect Bret. Bret tells Heather that he thinks she's here for him, and doesn't think she's lying to him. So it turns out that she's not in trouble at all! Rather, Bret is all pissed off about Erin. He still thinks she's a boyfriend, and notes that every time he turns around, she's jawing about some celebrity or other who's coming into her restaurant. He also can't believe that Erin would be so upset about not getting to meet Justin Timberlake when she has access to the legendary Bret Michaels! Of Poison! The band that performed, "Every Rose Has Its Thorn." Bret says that he's just Johnny Bravo to Erin. The mind games of the house are getting to him, and he's furious that half of the girls there are testing him. Tonight at elimination, it's on. Heather's feeling golden.

Bret Mail! "Good morning my tough-ass players / Magdalena, Bebe, and Mia / You each made my day with your pigskin playing skills / I hope you're prepared to go in for the kill / Go get dressed, dolled up and cute / I'll meet you soon and then we can shoot." The girls are psyched to go to the shooting range. Back at home, meanwhile, Lacey and Heather make the most transparent attempt to get dirt on Erin. As the three of them sit by the pool, Lacey says she'd love to meet a nice doctor or lawyer, but has never been attracted to straight-edge, preppy jocks. Erin replies that that's what she's into, usually. Oh, what a dumb-ass. Heather and Lacey both say, "Wassagoinon," which is code for "Victory!"