With a few seconds to go, it's basically Jes versus Heather. Heather, in her underwear, is on fire right now. Jes is equally determined to win the date. Bret passes the ball. Heather is covering Jes, but loses her footing in the mud. If only she had had the extra weight that pants provide, it might not have been so. Jes catches the ball, makes the touchdown, and that's the game. Yay, Jes! The Fallen Angels are DENIED! Heather is pissed and interviews something that is incomprehensible, due to beeps, though you do make out at least one "stupid bitches" and several fucks, so you get the idea. Jes is giddy with victory. Bret gives the Sweethearts the first annual Bret's Mudbowl trophy, and gives Jes, the obvious MVP, a varsity jacket and a kiss. Bret says that Jes is very young and very beautiful, but he has no solid connection to her. He's looking forward to the date. Lacey is disappointed and feels that between this and the motorbikes, she can't win. Well, it's good to see her finally getting an inkling of the fact that she sucks.
When the girls get home, they're a bunch of broken bitches. Sore and exhausted, and not in the usual places, they look pretty ragged. Lacey and Heather sit by the pool, and Lacey notes that she can be very vindictive when she wants to be. NO?!?!?!? If she can't win the challenges, she interviews, she might as well spend her time trying to knock some bitches out of there. Jes, meanwhile, gets ready for her solo date. She tells us that she's really frazzled, which never happens to her. Jes wears a nice black halter dress and has her hair straight down, which clues us in that it's going to be a very elegant evening, and that an acoustic version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn" will likely be played. Jes tells us that, though she's only twenty-three, her walls are pretty high because every guy she's dated has cheated on her. She clearly has loser taste in men, which is probably why she's kind of into Bret. She wants to show Bret that, although she keeps him at arm's length, if he gives her enough time, she'll let her guard down. Big John is going to be Jes's escort to the date. Jes wonders where the hell Bret is. Probably banging Heather.
Meanwhile, Erin is on the phone with Josh, her manager at "Underground." Josh tells Erin that tomorrow night, Justin Timberlake is going to be there. The funny thing is that Josh is like, "That Sexy/Back guy," like he doesn't even know who J.T. is. Dudes are always like, "What, is that the homo from The Backstreet Boys or something?" like they totally never made up a dance to "Cry Me a River" in their bedrooms. But I'm onto them. Lacey tells us that Erin would have served him, so is very upset. I bet Erin got her special friends redone just for these sorts of occasions. Lacey overhears the whole thing and goes in to tell Heather. She says, "Like she'd rather be hanging out with Justin Timberlake than with Bret. Like, oh my God!" Yeah, what dumb-ass would want to hang out with someone who's young and cute and a gazillionaire and can sing and is still totally musically relevant. NOT ME, THAT'S FOR SURE! Heather is sitting herself down and writing Bret a letter "exposing" the other girls, which she's sure will go over well. She interviews, "Get the hell out of here and go hang out with Justin Timberlake, you starfucker." And I mean, that's actually like the pot calling the pot a pot. Lacey tells Heather that they took out Dallas, and now it's time to get Erin out of there. Lacey interviews that they're going to get as much dirt on her as they can and present it to Bret, like he's freaking Judge Ito, and then he'll send Erin home.