And then it's time for the arrival of Lacey's dad, who will most certainly be played by Robert Duvall in Wassagoinon: The Rock Of Love Story. Lacey tells us that she's definitely daddy's little girl. There's also a woman with Lacey's dad, who is very blonde and carries a Chanel bag. Lacey shows her dad and apparently despised stepmom the Love Dances With The Devil album cover, and her dad gets a weird look. Or maybe he just couldn't see it properly, what with the glare coming off his earring. Lacey gets a little embarrassed. Not about the earring, but about her dad seeing her looking seductive in red underwear. Like that's never happened before. Bret introduces himself to Otis and Karen, and then tells us that he remembered meeting Lacey's dad on a flight several years ago. As Bret recalls, he thought Otis was pretty odd. I mean, it's true that, in terms of strangers you meet on a plane, you only really remember the people you wished would have shut up and let you read your freaking US Weekly. Otis remembers showing Bret a picture of Lacey. Bret had asked if he could date her, and Otis told him she was way too young. Awkward! Otis doesn't look amused by this. Bret can tell that he's very protective, and sees that there's a ticking time bomb in Otis's eyes. It's called "the crazy," and it is apparently genetic. He must, however, be very rich to have landed the hot second wife.
Bret gets all the girls and all the parents together to lay out the plan for the day. Heather's mom is totally rocking the Zima. It's exactly what my mom would be doing, so I love her. Otis is wearing loafers with no socks. It's a bad sign. A very bad sign. Bret will spend time with Heather and her family first, which she is really excited about. Things are already going well, as Bret tells David that he had to go through Heather to get to him, but knew it would happen eventually. Bret takes them to one of his favorite restaurants, the Saddle Ranch Chop House. Heather already loves the place. Really, they are totally meant to be. Bret wastes no time in ordering a giant beer bong. Brenda says that she doesn't drink that stuff, and Heather tells her not to worry; they'll order her a screwdriver. I love Heather's parents. Well, except, okay. Brenda tells David to tell the story of "the Chinese" that was next to him. It's something about farting. I'm sure it's funny when you're there to hear it. Bret loves that Heather's parents hit the bottle and started telling jokes. They're all laughing and having a great time. Heather -- who loves that her dad is off the wall and says crazy shit all the time -- is glad that Bret thinks he's hilarious, too.