The race is down to Mia and Rodeo. In the words of Rodeo herself: "Mia thinks she can ride, but she has nothing on me. Not a damn thing. I'm gonna ride that damn bike like she's never seen anybody ride a motorcycle." And indeed, Rodeo rides the night next to Mia, then leads her through moonlight only to burn her with the sun. And a fiery hot burn it is. Rodeo says, in the continuation of a soliloquy that will be used for hundreds of high-school drama auditions henceforth and win Holly Hunter a Golden Globe for her performance in Lifetime's The Rock Of Love Story: "I'm coming over that hill, and there's another hill that I've gotta go over. And I see that good-looking man waving that flag and all I wanna do is jump that hill right into his arms!" If she actually could do this while riding the motorcycle events would take a tragic, yet awesome, turn indeed. Like a house on fire, Rodeo wins it for the pink team! She says, "I rode it like a Rodeo should, and I think it turned his ass ON! Nnn HUH HUH HUH HUH! Nnn huh HUH HUH HUH!" Rodeo's triumph will be celebrated for generations. Magdalena and Sam will get their date tonight, while Rodeo and Brandi M. will cavort with Bret tomorrow. They both start laughing and totally look like mother and daughter. Sorry, Rodeo. Rodeo gives a yee-haw for good measure, and we're out.
The girls celebrate in the limo on the way home by cracking open a few beverages. Lacey -- still mad about how she fucked everything up for her team -- decides to take out her anger on Dallas. She yells that there's a squirrel outside the limo, and tells Dallas to go eat it. She's so fucking stupid. Dallas seems to be getting really pissed and then makes what I think is an EXCELLENT point when she asks Lacey what Bret was wearing the other night. Teacher's pet Brandi C. yells, "SNAKES!" It would actually be awesome if Brandi C. were yelling because there were actually snakes in the limo, like on the plane. But really, Dallas is so right, because Bret was wearing, like, a cow pelt at the last elimination. Shut up, Lacey. Dallas calls Lacey a hypocrite. Lacey denies this, and Dallas animatedly screams that he was wearing leather. And then something happens that's cut, because all of a sudden Dallas is REALLY mad and screaming that she's going to kick Lacey's ass. It's, like, drunken rageoholic stepfather type of screaming. Most of the girls are laughing, but Rodeo looks totally concerned. Dallas says that Lacey is dead to her, and tells her not to get in her face. Brandi C. carries a laughing Lacey out of the limousine while Sam stays behind and calmly asks Dallas not to punch her. To which I say...punch the bitch!