Rock of Love

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Motocross

The girls celebrate in the limo on the way home by cracking open a few beverages. Lacey -- still mad about how she fucked everything up for her team -- decides to take out her anger on Dallas. She yells that there's a squirrel outside the limo, and tells Dallas to go eat it. She's so fucking stupid. Dallas seems to be getting really pissed and then makes what I think is an EXCELLENT point when she asks Lacey what Bret was wearing the other night. Teacher's pet Brandi C. yells, "SNAKES!" It would actually be awesome if Brandi C. were yelling because there were actually snakes in the limo, like on the plane. But really, Dallas is so right, because Bret was wearing, like, a cow pelt at the last elimination. Shut up, Lacey. Dallas calls Lacey a hypocrite. Lacey denies this, and Dallas animatedly screams that he was wearing leather. And then something happens that's cut, because all of a sudden Dallas is REALLY mad and screaming that she's going to kick Lacey's ass. It's, like, drunken rageoholic stepfather type of screaming. Most of the girls are laughing, but Rodeo looks totally concerned. Dallas says that Lacey is dead to her, and tells her not to get in her face. Brandi C. carries a laughing Lacey out of the limousine while Sam stays behind and calmly asks Dallas not to punch her. To which I say...punch the bitch!

Lacey interviews that you can't just call her a hypocrite and go running off. They were in a limo. She didn't go running off anywhere. If anyone went running off it was Lacey, which makes the above remark a bit hypocritical, don't you think? [Run run run run run run run.] Lacey is going to confront Dallas, but wants to be in the correct attire to do so. She puts on her "I heart PETA" shirt. I love animals and all, but it's bitches like this who give PETA a bad name. Meanwhile, Dallas endeavors to wear every dead animal in the house. Many others are content in helping her put together the greatest leopard print/leather/snakeskin ensemble in the world. It is so hilarious, and just underscores Dallas's superiority in this matter. I mean, they're both crazy, don't get me wrong. But still: Team Dallas. Jes tells us that Dallas strutted her shit in front of Lacey and rubbed it in her face, which is good, because Lacey deserved it. Lacey interviews that no one can cross her like that and get away with it. As Dallas prances Lacey starts yelling at her to listen. When Dallas doesn't, Lacey actually goes up and POKES her in the FOREHEAD. Oooh, shit. You do not DO that. Dallas gives a look and methinks Lacey is going to have to call for assistance from Captain Save-a-Ho momentarily.

Dallas interviews that she really doesn't appreciate it when hos touch her face, and adds that if you want to touch her, hit her, so you can get it on and solve it. Lacey is just standing around going, "Daaallllaaaas! Daaallllaaaas!" which leads Jes to say that she's acting like she's possessed. And looking like it, too. Though, really, who could tell the difference? Lacey is not a pretty girl. She looks a little like the Queen of Hearts from Alice In Wonderland, all flat-faced and jowly. She keeps following Dallas around, and calls her a waste of sperm and egg. Dallas interviews that it's really hard, but that she just has to walk away; otherwise she's going to beat her some honky ass and get thrown out of the house. Lacey interviews that her strategy is just to push and push Dallas's buttons so she'll break down and hit her and get sent home. She is such a jerk. And so annoying! She keeps following Dallas around and touching her, which makes Dallas yell at Lacey not to touch her, which makes Lacey follow her around and touch her more. Lacey is like the kid who just starts repeating everything you say until you want to smack him silly. I am no fan of confrontation, but at this point I would totally deck Lacey, or try to perform some silicone enhanced kung fu.

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Rock of Love

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