Rock of Love

Episode Report Card
Potes: A | 563 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Once A Cowgirl

It's down to Peyton, Catherine, and Inna Tuna for the last pass. Peyton thinks that a miracle pulled out of a hat would be the only thing to save her. Maybe the glistening on her chest is the tears of Baby Jesus? One side of Catherine's brain is saying that she's going home, while another is telling her not to give up. The third side is planning how she'll impress Bret with her mastery of the Mashed Potato and Hand Jive if she stays. Bret tells the women that his decision was difficult, but is based on how he feels. He calls Inna Tuna to him and asks her if she's attracted to him. She says of course she is. He notes that she was very strong at the beginning, but that he's been losing her a bit. He wonders in an interview where his Ukranian Love Tank has gone. Nonetheless, Inna Tuna gets a pass. This of course means that Peyton and Catherine are out.

Bret stares at Peyton's sweaty chest and tells her that she looks absolutely beautiful, before spewing some bullshit about not wanting to lose her as a friend. Peyton is very upset. She thinks that she and Bret had the makings of an incredible passionate couple. Eh. If Melissa Etheridge weren't already taken, I'd suggest that Peyton might want to go that route. Janis Ian might still be available. Bret then calls Catherine to him. She's all sweaty in the chest, too! Maybe she and Peyton were having hot flashes? Bret says that he didn't get to know Catherine as well as he got to know some of the other girls. Plus, he hates old chicks. Catherine walks off and is now wearing white shoes with sheer black pantyhose. She deserves to be booted, man. She holds it together as she says that there are people in the house who don't want this as much as she does, and that Bret will have to figure that out for himself. I am dying to get this woman on What Not To Wear or some Oprah-sponsored makeover show. Anybody?

Next time: Oh my God, is that Bea Arthur? And more Kristy Joe drama. Snore.

Rock of Love

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