Bret comes down the hall and oh my hell! He has on his formal wig. No bandana! It waves in the breeze like fields of gold, his wispy bangs framing his liner-free (!!!!) undereye bags. It is one of the wiggier-looking wigs you have ever seen. Dolly Parton is all, "I knew I was missing my Scraggly Malnourished Country Girl model 465-F!" The wig waits atop Bret's head for Ambre to stop hugging her dad. It takes a while. Bret shakes Ambre's dad's hand, and tells them that today they'll be enjoying some barbeque and football. And then they'll all take turns yanking Bret's wig, which is like the old dad standby, "Pull my finger," for the new millennium. Bret's wig tells Ambre's dad to make himself at home. Ambre tells us that her dad is a conservative, church-going Southern gentleman, and she's a little nervous about what he's going to be subjected to. Well, he's already been subjected to the wig. How much worse can it get?
Ambre introduces her dad to Daisy and Destiney, and Daisy starts to get a little nervous. She tells us that the last time she saw her dad she was seventeen, and the last time she saw her mom she was twenty. She's not in touch with her family, and doesn't know who is coming for her. Well, I know that the sun will come out...tomorrow. No, but that's kind of sad, even though it probably points to some more Daisy weirdness that hasn't been revealed yet. She's scared that she's going to be a loner crybaby today, and wonders what Bret will think of her not having a family. Except for that famous uncle she's always talking about, of course.
The doorbell rings again, and this time it's Destiney's parents. Destiney is very excited that her parents will get to share this experience this with her. Her dad seems like a real rock n' roll sort of dude, and wears a red velvet jacket with a big cross on the back. At first I thought he had hair plugs, but it turns out it's actually a big tattoo that goes around his whole head! Bret thinks Destiney's parents seem like biker hippies, and digs it. Destiney introduces her parents to the rest of the folks in the house, as Daisy continues to feel awkward. She tells us that she's been on her own since she was fifteen, and wishes she had parents there at certain points. And you know, over the past several episodes, Daisy has really taken all the enjoyment out of making fun of her. It's like Britney. To be honest, at this point she just depresses me and kind of makes me hate humanity. Believe me, I'm unhappy about it, too and wish she would go back to being your run of the mill lighthearted dicksucker. But for now it's Little Orphan Tranny all the way.