It's time for Bret's date with Sam and Lacey. Lacey is wearing a fucking dickie with a cropped sweater over it. It's the fashion equivalent of her soul. There is a Bentley waiting for them, and Sam wins rock-paper-scissors to get shotgun. The real victory would have been if she whipped out actual scissors and plunged them into Lacey's windpipe. Back at home, there's a bit of a nefarious ass-saving alliance forming between Brandi and Heather. Who is topless. I'm sure you're surprised. They're pissed about losing the challenge, and want to show Bret how strong and interested they are, so decide to take sexy pictures of themselves to give to him. Back in dateland, Bret takes Sam and Lacey to a place called Neptune's Net, which looks like a clam shack or something, for food, a talk, and some brewskis. Bret asks if they thought that Jes contributed a lot to the shoot. He is for sure a catty bitch himself, always trying to stir up shit. Sam thinks that Jes did a good job. Lacey...well, you know what she thinks. Bret interviews that Lacey is always throwing the other girls under the bus, and it's starting to worry him. When it's not a turn on, that is.
When Lacey takes a break to go for an innocent piss, Sam jumps right in and tells Bret how awful and fake and manipulative she is. Sam interviews that she wants to believe that Bret sees through Lacey, but something tells her that he's trying to understand Lacey. Indeed, he tries to understand her each night, as she makes her oral case repeatedly. Sam asks if Bret can trust Lacey. When she makes him look her in the eye, he says no. She asks what he's doing. Bret doesn't know. Ooh, big surprise there.
Bret tells us that his date with Sam and Lacey was informative, but not sexy. However, he's got something special planned for his solo date with Jes. They hop on his motorcycle and hit the coast. Jes loves it. Meanwhile, back at home, Heather is in curlers preparing for the girls' sexy shoot. Sexy like Marla Gibbs on the stoop! You work it, ho. She and Brandi tell Mia what they're doing, but don't invite her to partake. Mia offers to take the photos, and they decline. Back on the solo date, Jes enjoys the feeling of the wind in her hair. It's probably a big improvement from just looking like the wind sexually molested her hair. Ironically, after the ride, her hair is totally flat. She and Bret park at a private cove on the beach and head to some prearranged chairs. Bret seems to be in possession of his actual hair, since nothing makes a date go south faster than having your wig blown off at 70 miles per hour. Lacey and Sam return to the house, where they see Brandi and Heather taking "semi-pornographic" shots of each other. Lacey interviews that she guesses that's what happens when you leave two strippers alone together. That and poleburn. You know Lacey is going to get the better of them by taking sexy photos of herself in only a dickie. Devilishly hot! Heather and Brandi tape their Polaroids to the door of the B.A.M.B. room so Bret can't miss them.