MONDO EXTRAS

Tiffany: I'm in the PTA. [You and Janice Dickinson, honey.] Special talents? I can...[moves boobs...without touching them!] I do it to music, whatever.

Random Aged Lady 13: Here's the bottom line, it's like, if you're not putting out, your man's leaving you. That's the bottom line, isn't it? Have I learned in my life, or have I learned in my life? If you're not putting out, your man's going somewhere else. So this rock star's not going anywhere.

Random Lady 14: My boobs...these are mine. My boobs. They're big now because I'm gonna start my period. They'll go down.

Random Girl 15: We're waiting for the car, and she kind of sort of sat in the planter and passed out in the bush.

Random Girl 16: You know, it's getting hot and heavy, we're about to get it on and his pants come off...he has one leg. I know, it's hilarious. He had one leg, the other one was prosthetic. And I was like, oh my God, I didn't know what to do. I'm sitting there, like, um..."I've gotta work. I've gotta go, I'm sorry." So I call up my friend Kathy and I'm like, "Oh my God, I almost had sex with a one-legged man! I'm, like, freaking out." [If she had made it on the show, she could also brag that she had had sex with a three legged man.] She's like, "I thought you knew." I was like, "How would I know?" She's like, "Well he was wearing shorts, you know, when he sat down didn't you kind of see, like, the little plastic part?"

Faith: Usually we drink so much alcohol that it's...I'm not really sure about a lot of the details.

Random Other Terrifying Girl 17: She had grabbed the back of my hair, put my head on the bar, I grabbed a bottle, smacked the bottle across the bar, took it up to her throat and said, "Do you really wanna start this?"

Yes, it's the cream of the crop of humanity! And believe you me, this is just one small step on the silicone Mount Everest that is Rock Of Love. If your genitals are already starting to burn and itch just from the television waves, be comforted by the fact that you are not alone.