The concert is finally over, and all the girls get on the bus to head to elimination. Ashley, who got completely wasted after Big John focused his attentions on Farrah and Kelsey, crawls on the floor randomly slurring, "Biiiitch!" Farrah goes to talk to Kelsey, who yells at her to get away because she doesn't want to talk to anyone. Jamie wonders if Bret really wants an annoying skank along the lines of Farrah, Kelsey or Ashley. Yes. Yes he does. Next question. Beverly says that Kelsey is a nice girl, but she's young and not ready to be on the road with a reality TV, er, rock star. The next thing we know Ashley is picking through some frozen dinners and screaming, "People who eat basil are lame!" Seriously, my love for her just grows and grows with each passing episode. She's genius. There has been no better 20 seconds of TV in 2009 than Ashley reading the frozen dinner box instructions aloud: "Re...move tray from box. Cut...film." And then dumping the entire frozen dinner on Jamie. Jamie doesn't even know if they'll be able to make it to the elimination in their drunken, frozen stuffed-cabbage eating state.
However, triumph! Farrah, Ashley and Kelsey drunkenly stumble into the theater where elimination is taking place. Ashley's pre-elimination interview is as such: "Listen. I can't even spell elimination. I don't even know where I am. Pffff. [Wander off.] [Wander back.] [Pose.]" Kelsey acknowledges that she drunkenly laid on a speed bump and wept, but gives herself credit for showing up and taking whatever Bret has to say to her. Bret enters and asks the girls if they had an awesome time at the concert. Ashley says she puked, like, a lot. Bret gets right to it and calls Kelsey to him. He tells her that the road probably isn't the place for the two of them to attempt to find love. It's too tough for Kelsey and her speed-bump embracing ways. Kelsey was trying to be who she was not, and Bret has to sometimes make decisions for people, and his decision tonight is that her tour will end here. Everyone appears to be shocked. Ashley whispers to Farrah, "I don't think she has any of my clothes, it's okay." Keep smiling, keep shining, because that's what friends are for. Kelsey exit interviews that Bret apparently can't handle a girl who likes to get drunk and lay on speed bumps. She's going to go home and be single and not think about guys for a while. However, she says, the next guy she finds definitely won't be 44. Oh, dis! He also probably won't be a rock star. Or wear a bedraggled wig.