Rock Star
All Shook Up/Dana Dropped

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now!
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Falling Into Hole
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Tuesday

Brooke's showing a little more skin than usual this week. Nice...forehead. Her introduction alludes to the heat wave, like nothing's going to cool you down faster than packing yourself into a small auditorium with several hundred other walking radiators and then screaming and jumping up and down for an hour. She introduces the Supernovices, Supernova, and Dave, who for some reason his holding up a little idol of some sort. If there's an explanation for that, I missed it, because it's tornado season here in the Midwest so the guy who's been doing the weather on my CBS affiliate since I was half of Dana's age has to show his face and some weather radar of places the station doesn't even reach. By the time he's done yapping, the show has already moved on to some Mansion footage. Fortunately, I caught this week's webisode, so I think I'm pretty up to speed with what I missed, aside from whatever vapid handoff Brooke had to pronounce.

So when the songs for this week went up on the bulletin board, Lukas (rebellious iconoclast that he is) took them all down, carried them out to the courtyard, and dropped them in a stack on the picnic table. One of the songs was "Higher Ground," which caught Josh's attention because it's originally a Stevie Wonder song. But Tommy Lee's going to be playing on it, which likely means another double cover, Red Hot Chili Peppers style. So Josh smoothly withdraws his foot from that particular bear trap and resets it for to the other Supernovice who expressed interest: Patrice. At first she can't believe her good luck, and snaps it up. But almost immediately, she starts stressing about what she's gotten herself into. Especially after being in the bottom three last week. Later, we see her in the house, and Ryan wanders past, ominously intoning, "Tommy Lee." Patrice jumps on him -- politely, and in a civilized tone, but jumpy none the less -- asking him to knock it off. Someone's nervous already. She's like an actor you can't say "Macbeth" around. Ryan insists that's the first time he's said it, although he's heard others say it. Patrice apologizes. Ryan heads off down the hall, mouthing "Bitch" at the camera behind her back. Classy.

Back at the auditorium, Ryan and Patrice share a laugh in the Nut Gallery over this footage which they've probably just seen for the first time. Ryan's yammering some excuse to Patrice, although we can't hear what it is. And Patrice can't be thinking about that now anyway, because Brooke tells her that she's up first, which means: Tommy Lee. Oops, sorry, Patrice. Patrice's hair is all crazily pinned up in a way that makes her look like a rooster with a Women's Studies degree from UT-Austin. Amid screams, Tommy strips off his ratty little shirt and gets behind the drum kit. Brooke introduces "The Red Hot Chili Peppers' version of 'Higher Ground'" and they're off. Tommy plays in the style we all remember, all twirling drumsticks and flailing elbows and that expression that looks like he expects (quite reasonably) to put his own eye out at any second. As for Patrice, she's rather out of her depth here, although she gives it her all. There's lots of strutting and preening and even a little rolling around on the floor. She even steals a few of Storm's facial expressions. But then she mis-times her final pose at the end of the thrash coda. And then Tommy wraps it up with the longest drum solo I've seen on network TV in about twenty years before grabbing his shirt and scampering back to the judges' dais. "Tommy Lee!" Patrice announces to the audience. Oh, so only she's allowed to say it?

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Rock Star

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