Rock Star
Getting To Know You/Phil Broken-Hearted

Episode Report Card
M. Giant: B- | Grade It Now!
Supernova's Bassist Gets His Phil

Zayra sings from about mid-runway, behind the microphone stand. It's a stripped-down arrangement, with only Rafael the Lead Guitarist accompanying her on his electric. Which may be a choice, or it may be because the rest of the House Band hates her so much that they're boycotting her. Zayra sings like she knows it's not just her last time on the show, but her last time ever. And then the men are going to come and cut her up for her organs. It's such an emotionally naked and raw performance that I feel weird making fun of it. Not that it stops me. The audience waves their arms overhead all Purple Rain as the judges watch seriously. On the line, "If you don't have it you're on the other side," Zayra resists the temptation to point off stage left at where Patrice is waiting. At the end, the song slows down, which is a little awkward given that this is when the audience has decided to start clapping. She holds it together though, and everyone in the house except Gilby stands up to applaud what will no doubt turn out to be a rather classy swan song. Commercials.

Back from break, Phil, Josh, and Jill are still standing. It won't be the first trip to the bottom three for any of them. Or the last, if there's a God in Heaven. Brooke takes a long pause and says, "Josh." Someone groans, "No!" "You are safe," Brooke finishes, and tells him to sit down. Josh does, looking like he'd much rather go over there and thump her instead. Brooke does it again: "Jill..." everyone freezes. "...You are not in the bottom three." Dammit, lady, leave that crap to Seacrest. Yes, it's Phil, back in the bottom three. Phil gives a little head bobble and goes over to Brooke. Clip of Phil last night, and the judges on Phil last night. Back from that, Brooke turns it over to Jason, who says that he wants Phil to make him a believer and give "a performance that we could watch over and over again." Phil says that he's doing "A crazy song nobody's ever heard." One hopes the House Band has heard it, at least. It's called "Smoking Umbrellas" by Failure. Jason has clearly never heard of the band, and expresses his hope that it's not an omen.

It's not what I would call a catchy song. It's not even what I would call a particularly good song, but what do I know? It's basically a showcase for Phil to do what Phil always does, which is questionable pitch changes and flopping around, although he's still working on keeping that second thing under control. He sings a line of the second chorus to Patrice, who either sings or lip-syncs along, so maybe she's the other person on earth who's heard this song. Anyway, Phil wraps it up, and Brooke tells us that Supernova is debating whom to send home right now. They'll have a decision after the break, if they don't already.

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Rock Star




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