Dana's singing "It's My Life" by Bon Jovi, because apparently the Steppenwolf from last week was a little too much for her. And Iâm sorry, but anyone who tries to claim "Helter Skelter" and settles for Bon Jovi didnât deserve "Helter Skelter" to begin with. Especially in light of this performance, in which she keeps making all these video-chick faces into the camera and strutting around like Sheena Easton or some damn thing. It's actually a welcome distraction when she goes around behind Rafael the Lead Guitarist, who is fellating a Vocoder as he plays. Tommy looks borderline annoyed. When Dana's done, Tommy tells her that she's hot, and can sing, but that her performance was like "a Celine Dion extravaganza." He's actually frustrated with her as he all but begs her to "Bring it. Just, harder." Gilby is, as always, more blunt: "I just don't see it, man." Dana responds, "I'll show you, Gilby Clarke," in a little-girl growl. Gilby, to his credit, says that's exactly what he wants to hear. Brooke does the voting thing again for Phil and Dana. It won't help Dana.
Toby time. He's dialing it back again this week, with "Runaway Train" by Soul Asylum. Very clever, the way he keeps trying to win me over by choosing songs by Minnesota acts every time they come up. Unfortunately, many of us here in Soul Asylumâs hometown see the bright, shining line when our scrappy, rockinâ underdogs became...something else, and that line is "Runaway Train." In other words, there's really not much you can do with this song, and Toby definitely does it. He's singing from behind the microphone stand, staring into the camera all intense-like. It's clearly not working on Dave, who even pretends to be asleep. The songâs also weirdly edited in a way that I'm not going to bore you by getting into. This is when I first notice Tobyâs vocal resemblance to Ed Kowalczyk, the lead singer of Live. Which means that if a Live song ever comes up, he should avoid it at all costs. Toby does an almost interesting "Run, run, run" thing for a coda, and he's done. Dave says that Toby's still "dialed" vocally, but needs to work on his performances a little more. In fact, Dave says that he told Toby that last week, even though we didn't see that on last week's show. Oops. Toby makes the excuse that he wanted to show some emotion (well, if "pretty" is an emotion), but that next week he's going to "rock the crap ayt of it." Tommy says he wants Toby to "scare me." Toby promises to do just that. Well, not if he warns him, he won't. "Do you least expect it? How about now? How about now? Boo! Okay, let me try that again. Mate."