Significant Others

Episode Report Card
Pamie: C+ | Grade It Now!
Roswell 101

Can I go back to calling him Gladys? Jesse walks back to Isabel and says it'll be a forty-minute wait. He knows a new French place he's been wanting to try. The Eiffel. She's all stammery and strange. She says, "Let's go."

Back at the bowling alley, Michael asks Maria if she wants anything else. "Yeah," she says. "Anything but this." They announce for the owner of the Ford Festiva to go outside again. This time the trunk is open and the jack is showing. Michael laughs and leaves to go bowl his next round. Maria is shocked that he's leaving again. Michael says he has to "hit the head," because he thinks he has a bladder infection. Am I trapped in a '70s sitcom? Because that's where this storyline is from.

Michael runs up to his friends, who are still laughing about the "jack is showing" joke they made. They hand Michael his bowling shirt. They ask how Date Night is going. He says he'll be lucky if she ever talks to him again. Michael sits down next to Kyle. Kyle holds bowling balls up like they are boobs and asks, "Are these yours?" Does this mean I get to stop recapping this episode now? I do, right? Michael slaps the ball away and asks what's happening. Someone tells him that he's losing as someone else polishes Michael's ball. Someone else entirely tells him that this is the final frame, and if Michael gets a strike here, they will "win this motherfucker." For real, he just said "motherfucker." They know that nobody is watching this show and they can get away with that. I heard it. He said "motherfucker." Michael takes the ball and stands up. Kyle tells him to remember not to do any alien funny business. Michael stands to bowl just as Maria walks over and sees him. She's open-mouthed and shocked. Michael bowls a strike. The league rejoices. Michael looks up and sees Maria. She's not happy. He walks over to her. She pouts. He says he double-booked and made a mistake. She tells him to shut up. She says the other day at the diner, they were all there, and Michael was laughing with his friends, and Isabel asked if that was Michael laughing. Oh. Maria says that Michael never laughs like that when he's with her. She says that something happened right then. He's got friends, and that's important. She says she's an idiot for wanting so much of his time because it's important for him to have friends because they make him happy and she wants him to be happy because she loves him. Oh, this is BULLSHIT. She's happy that he's got friends and is choosing them over her? She says that he's not in trouble, but he's got to make up for their date tonight. He kisses her on the cheek and hugs her. Okay. Forget it. This show is for people in grade school.

Liz finds her mother, and they have a conversation I can't understand about doing something tonight and what Dad will think, and it must involve this black wig sitting there, but I don't know how. Her mom says this isn't Liz's fault. Liz asks what's going on. Her mother closes the bedroom door and walks over to her. She sits down all important-like and says that when Liz's father was seventeen, he was trouble and her parents hated him. He broke into people's homes. He had a girlfriend that he loved very much and everyone thought they'd end up together, but they didn't. He wrote her beautiful poetry. I don't know why they added that. He was driving drunk one night and had an accident and she died. He's never forgiven himself and now he's terrified that Max will get Liz killed. I'm not even going to comment.

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