Samantha Who?
The Restraining Order

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The Restraining Order

Back at home, Regina is sewing a quilt while Howard cleans his gun. Neither one of those things is a euphemism. Samantha has just told them the story, and Regina is just a little upset that Sam liked Nathan enough to stalk him but never introduced him to her parents. She also seems a little unclear on the fact that Todd has dumped Sam. Although I can't really blame her -- they spend more time together than I spend with my boyfriend. (Okay, he's not yet my boyfriend. But he hasn't gotten a restraining order yet, so that still puts me ahead of Sam.) Regina, depressed at the thought that Sam is so lousy at romance that she's never going to give her grandchildren, packs up her sewing and leaves. And then Sam and Howard talk, except that Sam is talking about her problems while Howard is talking about how much fun hunting is going to be, and neither listens to a word the other has to say.

Sam and Andrea are sitting at a table in a bar, talking about how hard it is for Sam to kick the stalking habit. Dena's voice pulls us back to the car, as she complains about Sam and Andrea going out for drinks without her. Sam reminds her that she was at swing dancing class, and cuts back to the bar scene. Sam says that she only stalked Nathan because she felt an overpowering compulsion to make him pay attention to her. Which is precisely the reason that Bad Sam stalked him. Andrea diagnoses Sam as having daddy issues. Which is an official diagnosis in the DSM-IV (or so I've read on the forums). Andrea thinks that Sam didn't get enough of daddy's love as a child, which is why she's so hungry for attention from men now. Oh my God, it's like looking into a mirror. Ahem. Sam thinks that Andrea's crazy, because she has a great relationship with her father. In fact, they just had a fantastic conversation in which he responded to not one thing she said. Sam doesn't want to have daddy issues, but Andrea thinks that being damaged and fucked up is how the two of them get men. Sam decides she's had enough damage, and runs away to find a gun because she's going to go hunting. Commercials.

Back in the car, Dena inexplicably screams at another driver. Sam decides to put the gun in the back seat to keep it away from Dena and her rage issues.

In the past, Howard and his ugly camouflage tip-toe into the kitchen, where Sam scares the hell out of him with a cup of coffee. She's dressed in camo pants and a lovely black tank top, and her hair is pulled back and looking very serious. And hot. She's kind of got an Aeryn Sun thing going on. Without the scary Australian accent. She explains that she's going hunting with him, and he emphatically tells her that she's not, and that while he'd be happy to spend time with her in the future, hunting is his time to be alone. He tells her to go back to bed, and she gives a fake yawn and runs away in a manner that is calculated to raise the maximum amount of suspicion.

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Samantha Who?

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