Sex and the City
Sex and the City

Episode Report Card
Alex Richmond: C | 1109 USERS: C+
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Great Sexpectations

Carrie sits by the phone, willing it to ring. Finally, it does. It's Berger. He's sorry he hasn't called earlier. They make cute banter for a bit; then she asks him to come over. Cut to more tepid sex. Cue the sounds of the M11 bus.

Carrie and Sam stalk a lingerie store. Sam says flatly, "Dump him. Fuck me badly once, shame on you, fuck me badly twice, shame on me." Carrie squinches her face. It looks like she's wearing a nurse's uniform. Carrie says she doesn't want to dump him, and "aren't we a little old to jump to the dump?" Yes, we are. But don't let age stop you from making mistakes. That's what experience is for. Sam says to the saleswoman that she's looking for something "to make a guy come in his pants the second he sees me." The saleswoman says, "Got it," and is off. Carrie asks if that look is for someone in particular, or just a general request. Sam says it's for the hot waiter from Raw. She's "going to fuck him tonight, but he doesn't know it yet!" Carrie says she wants to talk to Berger about the bad, boring sex they've been having. Sam advises against it, since that can "be a downer." She then illustrates what kind of downer it will be with a drooping pinkie, and says the only kind of talk that should happen in bed is the dirty kind of talk. Carrie says she can't do that unless she's been drinking. Aren't we a little old to be that uptight and puerile? And aren't we kidding ourselves, a little? I thought Carrie was supposed to be glib. It then dawns on Carrie that maybe -- just maybe -- this boring sex has been, in Berger's book, good! Maybe he likes his sex dull and flavorless! Carrie then impulse-buys some slutty lingerie and pink marabou-trimmed mules. Oh, boy.

Mir is on the phone with the TiVo tech support staff. Thank god, after a harrowing set-up process, I have never had to call. TiVo was a bitch to set up, but after that, it's been perfect. Metaphor? No. Reality. Mir yells into her phone: "I think you're not listening to me, I shut off the system for ten minutes and NOTHING IS HAPPENING! I'm sorry. I'm upset. I'm just used to coming home to something good! I DID THAT ALREADY!" She points the remote behind her and gets that boingy timpani sound, which is TiVo for "an exercise in futility."

Sex and the City

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