Ding-dong, Blair's home (in Miranda's apartment), and he brought something hot and sizzling. And I don't mean his ass. I mean a pizza. Mir complains that he breezed by without giving her a kiss, and he says he was waiting until he could use his hands. Then he does. They are such red-hot lovers. Then Miranda notices the little box on top of the pizza box. He says it's a surprise for after the pizza. Miranda fondles the box, and he playfully slaps her hand away. "After the pizza." Then his pager goes off (some b-baller broke his knee skateboarding) and he has to go to the hospital. Miranda waits about five seconds before opening the box. Inside is a giant chocolate chip cookie that reads, "I LOVE YOU." Miranda picks it up and starts eating it anxiously. Carrie VOs that Miranda doesn't like surprises.

Carrie and Mir walk down the sidewalk. Mir vents that Blair said I love you "on a cookie...then I panicked and ate the entire thing. If it wasn't there, I wouldn't have to deal with it." Mir says it wasn't the message, but the medium. I have to agree. Who says they love someone for the first time via a cookie? Or any other baked goods? Treats should not be the vehicle for expressing important emotions. I think the best time to tell someone you love them is after a faintly unpleasant chore, like moving a desk up three flights of stairs. If you can get through that, what's every other bump in the road. You think I'm kidding. Carrie says that Blair is in fact "perfect," but Mir seems a little doubtful. She agrees that he is being super-cute in helping to plan Brady's first birthday party, at which Steve's Maaa will probably put in an appearance. Carrie asks if there will be any clowns. "There is nothing scarier than a clown." That reminds me of the TWoP recapper convention in Las Vegas one year, when we dragged Jessica to Circus Circus completely against her will and tortured her by pointing out all the creepy clown art. And by we I mean "me." And that's not the only thing that's scary about that casino. Circus Circus is so ghetto that a C right on front of the building burned out, and it stayed unlit all night. We're talking "Circus Ircus." In Las Vegas. They didn't even care. Could you see that happening at Caesar's Palace? That's my point; it's ghetto.