Char has a talk with Harry about Why Judaism Is So Freaking Important. And Please, May It Not Be Because You Are A Whipped Mama's Boy, Because I've Been Down That Road. Harry says that if they were to get married, he'd want his children to be raised Jewish. Char, in a lovely white slip, says she's "challenged in the reproductive area," and while it's "not impossible, it is difficult." Poor Char. Harry says he loves her, and that he never thought he'd be this lucky to have someone like Char fall for a "schmuck" like him. Char laughs and says he's not a "schmuck." He's a "putz." Their eyes glisten as they look at each other lovingly, and the Yentl violin plays overtime. Harry says they can adopt, but Char's still concerned. "They wouldn't be your own!" Harry says, "Whatarygonnado." They kiss.
Sam, in a black PVC bra and garter set, smacks her Chip around as they play rough. He's handcuffed to the bed. Then the FBI bursts in, led by Sam's super, Juan. It seems Chip has done a bit of insider trading, and "every time a female goes down, the Dow goes up," Carrie VOs. Oy. Sam says dryly, "All the good ones are getting arrested!" Double oy.
Mir and Steve have their date with destiny. Or not. Steve says she looks "pwetty. You got a date later?" Ha ha, no. She just wants to explain why she picked a fight with him last week. He says he knows. He does? Yeah, she thinks he's getting too close, and hanging around too much, but it's okay, since he just started seeing someone else and he's not in love with her anymore. Oh! Oh. Great. Mir flips through her menu and doesn't say anything. Poor Mir.
Cut to the next morning. Mir and Carrie have coffee on a bench. Carrie's in another lingerie piece over faded jeans, a pinky-red cashmere cardigan, and a crazy scarf in her hair. And about ten bobby pins around the nape of her neck. Wacky! Mir says that Carrie can't say anything, or even look at her in a meaningful way, but she didn't tell Steve she loved him, and she won't, and she's gonna kill Carrie if she says anything or looks at her funny. Carrie doesn't look, but says that maybe Mir should have told him anyway, since they have a child together and "this is your LIFE" and "this isn't high school." Then Berger pops up out of the subway, also looking scruffy, but in that cute-guy-in-a-brown-suede-jacket way. So, Carrie? Runs away. Mir is all, "Are you leaving?" No, she's sprinting away in her stilettos. Sprinting away from the guy she likes, because she thinks she "look[s] like shit."