Shameless

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | 1385 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Loser Goes to Gitmo

Child molestation is this week's Milkoviches: It is everywhere! It knows when you are sleeping! It is at the Gallaghers' house! It is Karen's new mission in life! Meanwhile, Tony and Mike, the partner's name is Mike, are fussy about the loudspeaker and whatever, cops bitching at each other. Ian and Lip, same deal, bitching at each other while they wait for the pothead grandson of the dead lady to sell them a new water heater. For such a short episode there sure are a lot of filler scenes.

Fiona takes Casey over to Veronica's for a minute, and V's in the bathroom so she assumes it's Liam she's watching, and Fiona doesn't explain so you get a funny second where V stares at the baby and is like, "Who the fuck are you?" Even more awkward: Running into Tony with Steve in play. It's sad. Tony gets very intense, though, about Casey -- maybe trying to impress her -- all, "Choppers, SWAT, couple dozen extra units, Amber Alerts, we're gonna catch the bastard that took little Casey, and chop his pedophile nuts off." Fiona and Steve and their collective nuts go running.

Frank starts bitching about how Obamacare and Chinese ladies and trustafarians are to blame for kidnapping or some such, and Sheila shuts him up in absolutely the most awesome way possible: "Frank! Guess what! I made muffins using a Bundt cake batter! I didn't even need to add another egg!" That is so awesome. I wish every time he opened his stupid mouth she would start screaming shit like that. Karen comes in talking about how much she enjoyed her recent meal of penii, and Frank is like guh and Sheila's like, I don't know. Doing a little dance or something. She seems to be getting more unhinged -- "less hinged," I guess -- which I wasn't expecting. I kinda thought she'd hit the ceiling on that. Meanwhile, Karen comes home, calls Eddie "shithead," and wiggles her whaletail for Frank for awhile. Guh-ross.

Then comes the very busy very long part of the episode -- complete with screen titles and freeze-frames and every other heist-related movie move that Guy Ritchie wore out ten years ago -- that is the centerpiece of the episode. And you know, it kind of bums me out because the show is so stylish when it's talking like itself. Like the end of the episode is just so gorgeously shot, with Fiona standing on the street flipping out. And so the fact that the body of the episode is this sort of silly, parts-moving-too-fast-to-notice-nothing's-actually-happening thing, it is sort of a bummer.

Shameless

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