Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
Canadian Reach-Around

Fiona heads over to the neighbors' to ask about Frank's whereabouts, and of course Kev and Veronica are fucking each other's brains out, but Kev takes a second off to admit that Frank was super-hammered last night but gone by last call, "Which is pretty weird, because he usually hangs out to sink the other drinkers' dregs." God, I hate Frank Gallagher. Every time you think he's as gross as it gets, he invents new grossness.

Fiona reports back as to the fact that Frank is actually missing at this point, and they all jump in on a phone tree -- pulling neighbors' cords through windows, borrowed cell phones -- for a good long time. Veronica calls the hospital, Lip talks to somebody who hasn't heard from him since Michael Jackson died, and then the phone Veronica's talking on gets pulled back through the window and down the lane, back to her house. It's pretty hilarious, but even better when she finds Kev at the other end, hauling it in, and resumes her conversation.

They have a bit of a dustup about how Kev needed to call somebody before work, and his cell is gone, and the phone was off through somebody else's window, and the fight is really about Veronica's place as Fiona's best friend and helpmeet in the care and feeding of the world's most awful people. It gets ugly and loud and they are both in tremendous pain, but just before you think it's an atypical kind of fight, she tells him Frank's missing and that he should have fallen asleep after their session anyhow. Yelling, yelling, and then he kisses her sweetly on the forehead and takes off. Then she cleans the house in her underwear for the benefit of the internet. TV would have you believe that everybody does this, but in fact it is not really a common source of income. Take it from one who knows.

Everybody runs around looking for Frank for like a million years. Which, why not just have Debbie forge his name, cash the check, and move far, far away? He is the worst. I guess they love each other and whatever, but he's honestly a burden on all of us. Debbie's freaked out because she's the only one that likes him as well as loving him, they check garbage and dead places -- narrowly missing him at one point; checking coffins at the mortuary -- and they eventually bring in Hot Cop Tony that's in love with Fiona.

Tony explains that Frank is permanently missing at all times, so how are they supposed to file a report? "We've found him in dumpsters, garbage trucks, Mrs. Lutski's bathtub..." But never on the last Friday of the month, Fiona reminds Tony -- who gets this, even though Steve still doesn't -- and the cops go into overdrive, because Frank missing on Disability Day is like Santa Claus taking off work the one day of the year he shouldn't: Impossible.

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