Brian calls his style Caribbean, and I do actually like the crazy orange-red and ultraviolet pieces in there. It looks a little less sexy-frizzy and a little more I-lost-my-smoothing-gel-when-I-got-out-of-the-shower, but even that's not the issue. The issue for me is the big skunk stripe on the back when she turns around. It's totally out of place. Amy's bikini top is a piping hot mess. It looks sloppy and strange. Jon's model comes out with the strangest stompy walk I've ever seen (and I've watched a LOT of America's Next Top Model, y'all), but her hair is pretty cool -- half of it piled up on her head in loose curls while the rest comes down, and there are bright blue pieces worked in. Jon just sounds so ridiculously poncey, though, saying it's not his best work but it will do, like he's a bored genius. How can he even see it with those stupid glasses on?

Adee's girl has her hair pulled up into a sort of mushroom-do of frizz, and then has her horrible hair collar around her neck. The problem is that you can still see the girl's nipples, and it's kind of hilarious how the camera keeps panning in to prove it but they've had to blur them out and did a fairly good job, so you don't actually see anything at all. He tries to defend it as editorial and sexy, but it's not what he was supposed to do. Joey's girl comes out and I like her actual hair, which is big and wavy with red-orange pieces underneath, but then she has this giant rope-like hair necklace, and from there the pieces come down that preserve her modesty. Joey doesn't like that she strikes a couple of unnecessary poses on the runway, but he should be more worried about that necklace. Arzo's model is next, and her hair is half pulled back, in a bouffant on top and wavy on the bottom. Like some others it's simple, but it gets the job done just fine. Brig's girl then comes out and has used rubber bands to do her crocheted effect, the hair pulled down and then criss-crossed across her sternum, with the ends all frizzed out and crazy, but covering her nips. And with that, the first show is over, and the contestants are dismissed.