Shear Genius

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Welcome to Week 2, my darlings! The gang files in to the salon and are greeted by Camila, who points out that Janine's winning hairstyle will be featured on the "Allure Wall of Fame," where a photo of her model has been made into a fake Allure cover and presumably will be joined by photos of the winners in weeks to come. Then Giacomo raises his hand, and in the most low-key, unexpected and non-dramatic reality show exits ever, says he is asking to leave the show on account of him missing his babies at home. The expressions on the others' faces range from surprised to blatant eye-rolling. Faatemah speaks for everyone when she says she thinks it's a cheap out but hey, it's one less competitor. And one less head of glorious Kenny-G-esque hair. Alas! Camila wishes him well and he leaves. She then warns everyone that someone is still getting eliminated, which is something they clearly were not expecting. Camila then introduces Kim Vo to judge the short cuts challenge, and he comes out in hot pink pants, a white tee and a khaki cardigan. Naturally, the challenge has to do with color, and Adee promptly freaks out because he's had a colorist doing all that for him for years. A bunch of overprocessed blondes file in, and Camila tells them they have two hours to change their hair color and make it look healthy. Everyone draws scissor boxes to pick clients, and Adee picks first, and picks a girl who he thinks is hot, rather than necessarily the best model. Brig comments that there's one girl who has extra nasty hair -- seriously, it's standing on end and looks half a second from just falling out of her head in defeat -- and that she's the last to pick and doesn't want her. So she starts whispering to Matthew to not steal her model, she wants her, and so Matthew, with his next-to-last pick, gives us the episode title and announces, "I'm totally stealing your model." He sounds so proud, and doesn't realize he just played into Brig's trap, so we'll see how he fares. Camila leaves them with Kim and time starts.

Comb, comb, comb, talk, talk, talk, as all the stylists now try to force their will on their clients. Faatemah is totally dismissive of her client wanting to stay blonde, but... dude, she was blonde already by choice, which means that presumably it's what she likes and wants, so I'm not sure why Faatemah so surprised. She wants to give the girl roots so that it's not as noticeable when it grows out. That could go disastrously wrong, that. Adee thought he picked someone who wanted a change, but of course she wants to stay blonde as well. Brian is going... warm blonde. Basically, everyone just wants to still be blonde, and all the stylists are going to do some variety of highlights or lowlights to break things up. Amy gets a little sassy with her girl since she needs to win and the girl doesn't really want any change made whatsoever. Kim is telling everyone that they're playing it too safe, but all the clients maintain that they want to stay blonde, even when Kim starts chanting that everyone is blonderexic. Brig is the first to make a drastic change and wants to take her client red... as does Matthew. Kim makes another round through the salon where he stays skeptical and catty about everyone's choices, especially Adee. But, as Matthew points out, it's the hazard of picking the model you want to screw versus the one whose hair you could do in two hours. The montage o'styling is the broken up by a piercing scream, because Brian gets bleach in his model's eye. Someone better hope he survives this episode, because no one who sees this is going to hire him in the real world, for fear of blindness.

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Shear Genius

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