Shear Genius

Episode Report Card
Lauren S: B | Grade It Now!
Orange You Glad I Didn't Actually Want a Haircut?

The next morning they wake up to find a bowl of oranges and a note that says, "The fruit of your labor is on this table. Take your pick of the best oranges in the county and bring it to the salon." Everyone chuckles nervously and grabs an orange, each of which has a number on it. Parker talks again about color, sure that this challenge will be about color, which he doesn't do. Dude, maybe you should have thought about that before you entered a hair competition.

They walk into the salon and before they can line up, Rene runs in front of them and stops them all, promising them the toughest clients that they'll ever face. He tells them they need to give their clients a new look that meets the stylist's vision and the client's expectation. Two episodes in, and I've already noticed this type of wording used a few times. Do they know they can just say, "Give a good cut that both you are proud of and your client is happy with?" They then file in and shriek at a bunch of really plastic-looking women. Some look happy, some don't, and some look like they probably couldn't change the expression on their face even if they wanted to. These are The Real Housewives of Orange County, folks. This would mean more to me if I'd ever watched this show. Clearly, Daniel has watched it, as he nearly passes out with excitement. He actually held a party where he and his friends dressed up to watch an episode in which one of them got married, and Nicole takes the words out of my mouth that if she had ever done that, she would never actually admit it. Rene introduces the Housewives and their daughters to the stylists -- their challenge is to satisfy the clients, and Tabatha will be a judge again. Each of the women is holding an orange that corresponds to the oranges the stylists are holding, so they are paired up through their citrus.

Charlie has Orange Number 1, and he gets paired with Megan, who is Tammy's (?) daughter. Parker gets Tammy. Gail gets Kimberly, and Paulo gets Vicki, who he claims is the most "memorable" character on the show (after he watched one episode). I honestly wonder if the producers made them watch an episode the night before or something, because I can't actually believe that all eleven of these people have really watched that show. Dee gets McKenzi, Lauri's step-daughter, Glenn gets Tamra, and Nicole gets Jeana -- the very person she didn't want because of her stringy hair. Daniel gets Jeana's daughter Kara and squeals about it, Nekisa gets Lauri (whom Daniel has a total crush on), Meredith gets Vicki's daughter Briana, and finally Matthew is with Quinn. Before they start, there is one more twist -- because he won the Short Cut Challenge, Charlie gets to trade out his Housewife for another if he so chooses. He wants Kara, who he steals from a very ticked off Daniel. Charlie points out that Daniel was pissed, but who cares, because, "The bitch had immunity." He asserts he would have taken Kara from anyone, though, just in case we thought he was going soft on us. They've got two hours to cut, and Rene starts the clock.

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Shear Genius




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