Six Feet Under
A Private Life

Episode Report Card
Aaron: A | Grade It Now!
Yea, though he walk through the valley of the shadow of death

Aaron: I can't believe I'm saying this, but even though $pelling $tuff with "$" is $toopid, I'd rather watch Arli$$ than that.

Okay. Whew. After a quick cold shower of my own, I'm back. Billy is in the hospital, lying on his stomach with a huge bandage on his back. I know it doesn't sound like it from my description, but heh. Out in the hallway, a doctor gives Brenda the bad news about her brother. The doctor, by the way, is played by Alan Ball himself, which makes me wonder about the editorial decision they've made here to present these scenes in silence. We see lips moving, but we can't hear what anyone is saying. I suppose it's possible that it's some sort of metaphor for the death and silence Claire talked about earlier, but it's probably more likely that Alan is just a lousy actor and they wanted to cover up his audio. Anyway, we see Brenda slowly thumbing through some long legal document, and eventually she signs it. Then Nate shows up, and Brenda explains that, at long last, she's had Billy committed. Since I just mocked them a bit, and I'm not sure if I'll get a chance to rectify that in the next episode, I want to say now that the editing staff for this show has done great work all season, even in cases where they haven't had a lot to work with. Everyone should watch the end credits some time, and give those guys their due.

Formaldehyde Fortress. David comes home, and also finally comes out. He finds Ruth draped across the sofa with a washcloth on her face, and tells her that he wants to talk. "I'm gay," he announces, and all Ruth wants to know is why he didn't tell her sooner. He gently tries to explain that she hasn't always been the most open and understanding person in her life. "No one talked about anything [in this family]," he says. "We're not like that. Except for Nate, and that's just because he has no other way to distinguish himself." Is that a funny joke, or just more meta-mockery of the way Nate's character is written? You be the judge. David also feels like she's accepting his gayness because she has to, in the same way that they all face the dead bodies because they have to. "You’re wrong," she says. "I don't choose which part of you to love like some kind of chicken." Heh. On the other hand, David does have some nice drumsticks. I'm just saying. Ruth laments the loss of the halcyon days of yore, when David was little and she could fix all his problems. He promises to take good care of himself, and they reach out and touch fingers across the wide expanse of sofa that divides them. I missed what happened next because I was busy digging a chunk of symbolism out of my eye, but Ruth then ends the scene by standing up and announcing that they'll be having veal for dinner.

Up in David's Lusty Loft Of Internet Encounters, Darth Gayder continues to haunt our poor protagonist. "I could have come out to every mother in the world," he says. "And I'd still be dead." This prompts David to sit up in bed and reach for the phone. Presumably, he's planning to call Keith, because Darth interjects with, "Oh, what? You're going to interrupt him and his matching love stud?" David throws down the phone, but Darth continues, "Both of them will be in hell with us, by the way. But something tells me they’re going to have a lot more fun." David begs him to stop, and falls to his knees beside the bed. He prays for God to ease his pain, and as he kneels there in the corner, head bowed in supplication, we fade to white.

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Six Feet Under




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