Six Feet Under
Coming And Going

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Large And In Sarge

Rico is sleeping on a dead-guy stretcher in the basement. With the same wifebeater on, he must feel right at home, though. That thing is like his whore-fucking security blanket.

IT TALKS! Maya makes some sort of gurgly sound and Nate responds, but being a good father and talking to his ex-girlfriend on his cell phone don't have to be mutually exclusive activities, people. He's soon to take a call to that effect, and he finds Brenda on the other side of the phone, telling him that she admitted about 14% of her indiscretions to Joe. She tells Nate that she and Joe are okay and he tells her he's "really happy" for her, even though his wife is dead and he wanted you to know. She tells him to come and see the house, and when he starts to protest, she tells him, "I can't just surgically remove you from my life." You fucked in a closet! This isn't arranged marriage between cousins. Cut each other out of your lives and you'll both magically be cured of cancer. Meh. It's fun to watch. He tells her he has other plans today, to take Maya to "Travel Town." Y'know! For kids! And I love how the production staff must be all, "Hey, you guys, we're always going to be totally authentic in our Los Angeles geography," but then Claire goes to "LAC Arts" and Brenda goes to Some University With A Good Psych Program, and doesn't really seem to go that often, I notice. Brenda brazenly asks if she can go as well, and Nate is all "weeeeeeeeell..." and makes the same face my mother made when I was two and called this woman who cleaned our house "Mommy" and then we didn't see Claudette around anymore after that. She tells him that she has "no ulterior motives," and Nate correctly observes, "Brenda, we always have ulterior motives." She argues that they don't because her ulterior motive is to get herself out of a committed relationship with Joe.

George looks at a tree in the yard and then hacks the hell out of it with a hedge trimmer. Maybe The Matthew Barney Of Lac Arts would like to stand in front of a shopping mall with THAT.

Vanessa sits on her bed, finding Rico's bills inflated and his pants on fire, asking no one but us, "What kind of man spends this much money on a chick without getting laid?" One who really likes blowjobs instead? She takes a deep breath and reaches for the phone, telling her sister, "I'm done crying." Uh-oh for everyone else.

Nate, Maya, and mommy -- er, I mean "Brenda" -- hop on a toy train in Griffith Park that looks so fun, but if I went there unaccompanied by a child, would I be looked at oddly and asked to leave? Anyone need a babysitter? Because I kind of also want to see The Princess Diaries 2.

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Six Feet Under

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