Six Feet Under
Crossroads

Episode Report Card
Aaron: B | Grade It Now!
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Death, dicks, dope, and a dancer

Somewhere west of Burkittsville, Maryland, Claire is hiking up a mountain with her Sierra Crossroads group. Some American-as-apple-pie-looking blond kid walks beside her and listens as she quotes Carlos Castaneda to him. His response: "Yeah, well, Carlos Castaneda can blow me." I'll say. Captain America (whom I desperately want to call "An American Boy" but won't, out of respect for Gustave) thanks Claire for getting him high that morning. Then the group leader, best known (to me at least) as the wrestling guy from Grosse Pointe Blank, yells at them to keep up with the rest of the group. "Ja wohl, mein commandant!" replies Captain America (who, in what I can only assume is a shout-out to Traffic, has been saddled the improbable single name of "Topher").

Back at the Fortress, David is vacuuming the funeral room. Much like the anvil of sartorial symbolism represented by Nate's sudden return to scraggliness, David has ditched his coat and tie in anticipation of the loosening up he'll be doing later in the episode. Nate rushes in to tell his brother about the great idea he just had, which basically consists of renting out the slumber room to drunks and elderly dancers. David vetoes the idea of holding AA meetings in the house, but likes the senior citizen dance instruction, because they'll get the business when the fogies bite the big one. Personally, I'm just happy Peter Krause has put on a shirt, albeit a ratty green one. Suddenly the door opens behind them, and they turn to catch Federico attempting to sneak inside. When he spots them, he stops short and stares at their curious attire. "Is this a new company policy? Casual Fridays?" he asks. Don't tell my boss this, but I'm writing this recap at my desk on a casual Friday right now. Later on, I plan to steal a stapler for my new home office. I'm such a rebel. Anyway, Rico asks for the day off so he can go with his pregnant wife to get an ultrasound. My pronouns were a little unclear in that last sentence, but I bet you can figure out what I meant. Nate gives him permission to go, and Rico runs downstairs to the prep room, claiming he forgot his wallet and jacket there the night before. Alone again (naturally), the boys bicker about why David is always forced to be the bad cop. "Because you're so good at it," is Nate's explanation, and I, for one, am forced to agree.

Down in the Body Shop, Rico loads a duffel bag with the equipment he'll need to do the restoration. Suddenly Nate comes down behind him, causing Rico to jump about three feet into the air. They chat uncomfortably for a minute about the upcoming ultrasound and David's fetish for cleanliness, and then The Exposition Fairy rings my doorbell to make sure that I get that Nate is suspicious of Federico. Fortunately, my TiVo lets me pause live TV, and I return from the door just in time to catch this gem from Nate: "When [David and I] used to play GI Joes, [David] always wanted to give his a shower." Freddy Rodriguez's expression in response to that little tidbit is just priceless. This guy better not be leaving the show. He does, however, leave the Fortress, and Nate turns to stare at the cabinets, noticing that Rico has taken some equipment.

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Six Feet Under

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