Upstairs, everyone is gathered in the den, enjoying the awkward silence. Nikolai chimes in that Ruth is a good woman, and David snaps at him. "You'll have to excuse my brother," says Lauren, "he's been really cranky ever since he stopped getting laid." Heh. Now she sounds exactly like my sister. I wouldn't worry too much, though, because apparently, the authors of the Bible also read spoilers. ["And Jesus sayeth unto her, Thy brother shall rise again." -- John 11:23] Wow. Who knew? Then again, if God could correctly foretell the departure of Duchovny, I guess we shouldn't be surprised. Nikolai THE FLOWER GUY shrugs off David's remarks, and mentions that he had a son who would have been slightly older than David. And that's all the detail we get for the moment on that potential plotline, because now Nate and Brenda show up and greet everyone. In a sign of things to come, Nate is already getting a little touchy-feely with Brenda.
Dinner. Everyone sits around the table, and Ruth asks for someone to say grace. Before David can start, however, Nikolai jumps in. I'll just transcribe the following bit verbatim, because it's totally worth it:
Nikolai: The poor shall eat and be filled, and those that seek The Lord shall praise him. Their hearts will live forever and ever. Glory be to the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit, both now and forever, and unto the edges of edges. Amen. [This next part is accompanied by vigorous chest-thumping and gesticulating.] Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy, Lord have mercy, Lord Bless. Oh Lord, Jesus Christ, Son of God, for the sake of the prayers of Thy most pure mother and all the saints, have mercy on us. Amen.
Once he's finally finished, Nate sums up what I'm sure is everyone's opinion of Nikolai's amazing grace. "Nikolai, you are so beautiful," he says. "You're such a beautiful person. There's this total light coming out of you." "That's a very unusual compliment," says Mom. "Your brother is, like, high," says Gabe. Nate over-fills his glass with wine, and I cringe in remembrance of a few recent hangovers. In fact, I've given up champagne for Lent, and I'm not even Catholic. Oh, wait. That's not the RDC Challenge anymore. Oops. My bad. I guess although I'm not a rookie, I'm not yet a seasoned recapper again. Oh, and also? Sweater, camembert, fluglebinder, vitamins, ontological rutabagas, Shirley Temple, Enron, ban Sorkin, and "We get it." Good luck guessing that there Challenge now, kids! Everyone watches incredulously as Nate sips directly from his glass, paws Brenda, and generally continues to make an ass out of himself. Finally, Brenda gets his attention. "Nate, you're high," she tells him, and then forces him to look up into the lights for confirmation. Peter Krause has a pitch-perfect expression on his face as he gazes up to the ceiling and replies, "Oh my God, I am high. I love the little…they're like halos." There was some more there, but I was laughing too damn hard to hear it. "I am SO not hungry," announces Nate, ending the scene. "You are SO right about that," I immediately shouted back at the screen.