Six Feet Under
Perfect Circles

Episode Report Card
Aaron: B | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
To Your Scattered Bodies Go

Brenda Chenowith: Ooooh! Ahhhhh! Oh! Give it to me, baby!
Mickey Barnes: Would you mind if I popped in a Three Stooges video real quick?
Brenda Chenowith: Shut up, Binder. Shut up and FUCK ME! You too, Arliss.
Mickey Barnes: Well, if you insist. But, uh…are you sure it's okay for HIM to be here?
Casey McCall: Everything's cool; I got her panties right here in my side pocket.

The next segment opens with the classic line, "That was Dr. Schrödinger. Kitty didn't make it." Ha! Alternate Reality Nate #6 (or, as I like to call him, "Beavis") is sprawled out on the sofa watching TV, complete with a beer belly, long greasy hair, and a really bad white-trash accent. I guess this must be the West Virginia version of the Fisher family. He's got some random girl there with him, and they're watching a soap opera that was clearly produced specifically for this episode. "What's going to happen to us?" wonders the female Meta-Fictional Soap Star. "There, there," replies her male counterpart, accompanied by the chortling of a laugh track. "We always end up in a universe in which we exist. Remember Copenhagen?" "Oh yes," she sighs. "The eigenvalues were in bloom." Oh, Alan, Alan, Alan. You have GOT to call me, my friend! Hell, I've been sitting on an unsold screenplay called Schrödinger's Hat for three years now, and it's just chock full of exactly this sort of witty physics wordplay. So, seriously. Get in touch. I promise not to Bohr you. ["Throw physics to the dogs: I'll have none of it!" -- William Shakespeare. "Macbeth" (Act V. Scene iii.)] "Quit flappin' yer trap," replies Alternate Reality Nate #6, "I like this show." Sorry, Nate.

Kevin Spacey: I had always heard that your entire life flashes before your eyes the second before you die. Only that one second isn't a second at all, it seems to stretch out forever like an ocean of time.
Christine Baranski: Ocean of time? The damn show was only forty-seven minutes long!
Cybill Shepherd: Oh, just have another martini, Maryann. [laugh track]
Brett Butler: Shut up, Cybill. Shut up and PONDER THE HEISENBERG UNCERTAINTY PRINCIPLE!

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Six Feet Under

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