Six Feet Under
The Foot

Episode Report Card
Aaron: C+ | 1 USERS: A+
'Til Death Do Us Part

Old McFisher's Farm. Nate and Mom are huddled around the kitchen table, and Nate is shocked to learn that Mom lost $25,000 at the track. Wow. I feel better about the $21,000 now, although my investors would have likely had better luck at the track anyway. Let's not tell them that, though, okay? Mom explains that she was on a winning streak, but then things turned bad. "You should have been more careful," he tells her, but she doesn't want to be careful, she "wants to feel alive." Nate thinks that "there should be a way to do that that's a little less expensive," and actually there are several, but most of them are illegal in this state, so I'll just move on. David returns home at this point, shocked to see people who are even more depressed than he is. Before he can even ask what's going on, Mom blurts out that she lost the money and then bolts from the room. Yeah, whatever. Let's get back to the real action, shall we?

And it would appear that said action is taking place in a deserted lot somewhere. Keith scours the area with his flashlight, but doesn't find anything. Suddenly he's joined by Claire, who's on a foot-finding mission of her own. They share some awkward small talk, and then we cut back to the funeral home, where Dumb's service is already in progress. The brothers stand in the back, and Nate expresses relief at the fact that it wasn't he who lost the foot after all. Federico appears, and David compliments him on his restorative prowess. Up at the casket, the Dumb Daughters agree that it is an excellent job. They open the casket to closely examine the entire body, and David quickly runs to the front to put a stop to that. "I know it's silly," says Whiny Daughter, "but I just want to see with my own eyes that Pop's all put together right." Actually, I think it's more contrived than silly, but since I've almost worn out the C, N, and V keys on my keyboard from typing that word so many times, I'll just let it slide. David reluctantly allows them to open the lower portion of the casket, and he and Nate are surprised to see that Dumb is fully assembled and in possession of both his feet. They quickly run back to Rico, who explains that he cobbled together a fake foot out of latex, duct tape, and a leg of lamb he found in the freezer. Damn, this guy's like the MacGyver of embalming. Next thing you know, he’ll be assembling a nuclear reactor out of paper clips, chewing gum, and the remains of some guy from Three Mile Island.

Back in the Field Of Feet (where, if you dismember it, they will come), Claire is explaining that she was following Gabe to get the foot back when she saw him toss it. I'm wondering how Gabe didn't see that he was being followed by a giant green hearse with "Toe-Sucker" painted on the windshield, but it's late, and I'm tired of trying to figure this crap out. Besides, it's Lauren, and I'm willing to forgive her anything. Anything but another musical number, that is. She rants about how she just wanted revenge and that all guys are assholes, and Keith sighs a bit before agreeing with her. "You ever suck a guy's toe?" she asks him, and he answers in the affirmative. "Yeah, me too."

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Six Feet Under




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