Six Feet Under
The Liar And The Whore

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Dog Dead Afternoon

Inside, she and Nate get comfortable on the couch while he unburdens his soul. After he admits to all the horrible things he lied to Brenda about, Ari asks him why he has so much trouble being honest with his fiancée. "I don't think it's particular to Brenda," sighs Nate, which prompts Ari to further inquire why he has trouble being honest with women in general. "I don't have any trouble being honest with you," he replies. Go Nate! Get your flirt on! Ari quickly backtracks, reminding him that she's a rabbi and thus "unavailable to [him], even in [his] wildest dreams." Now, I know a lot of people are turned off by her constant assertions that she and Nate can never be together, but the sad truth is that that's pretty much exactly how Jews really flirt. That's why I keep insisting I can't marry anyone from my love thread. The scene continues with Ari delivering some psychobabble about the nature of unintended consequences, but since no one is really interested in my thoughts on Talmudic law and its implications for the famed Schrödinger's Cat theorem, I won't bore you with details. On the other hand, Nate clearly has a thing for girls who go metaphysical, so maybe it's actually a very clever dating technique. Anyway, the scene ends with them holding hands, each secretly wishing that they could rip the other's clothes off. I swear, if Nate doesn't dump Brenda for this woman soon, I don't know what I'll do. Probably make fun of his hair some more, I guess. I mean, even sports writers think they should be together, for God's sake.

And while Nate is learning that once you go Jew, no others will do, Brenda sits alone in a donut shop, mulling the sad state of her life. Fade to white.

We fade back up on the Body Shop, where Rico is gloating about Vanessa's referral. David doesn't actually use the words "Shut up, Rico" here, but his meaning is pretty much the same. As he examines the body, however, Rico notices that something is amiss. After some brief C.S.I.-style exposition, he pulls out the corpse's dentures (ew), says "What the fuck?" (of course), and then uses a pair of forceps to extract an entire hot dog from the woman's throat (ew, ew, and furthermore, ew). David's expression is hilarious as Rico waves the hot dog right in front of his face. "Now you tell me," says our annoying little friend. "I don't think something this big just happened to go down the wrong way." Um, okay. Whatever you say there, Gil.

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