Six Feet Under
The Secret

Episode Report Card
Aaron: D+ | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
I'm not dead yet! (It's just a flesh wound.)

Strega: She thinks THAT place is dank? Obviously she's never been here. Ew. Is that a pair of underwear on the lamp?
Jessica: Aww. They've got little singing frogs on them. Isn't that cute?
Strega: Don't ever talk to me about Aaron's underwear again.

While their mother is out cleaning apartments and breaking hearts, Nate, David, and Claire are stuck at home, eating cereal for dinner. For you trivia buffs out there, they've chosen to go with Lucky Charms. Mmm. I bet Lauren is magically delicious. Sorry. Anyway, after determining that everyone's significant other is busy for the evening, Nate pulls Claire's "English" "paper" out of her backpack, and notices that the subjects of the photographs look somewhat familiar. He and David quickly page through the album, identifying people they've buried recently. "So do you think they're any good?" asks Claire. "I think they fucking suck!" Nate shouts back. "Do you have any idea what kind of lawsuit this could bring us? What kind of stupid, fucked-up child are you?" Note the extraneous usage of the word "child" in that last sentence. Claire tries to explain that she was just doing something she "gave a shit about," but they're interrupted by Ruth's return before she can finish. "What's going on here?" demands Mommie Drearest, causing the kids to quickly clam up. Nate tries to change the subject to why Mom isn't at Nikolai's, and she sternly blurts that it's none of their business. We get some awkward silence, then fade to white as Mom wonders where all her precious intimacy has gone.

We fade back up on some random homeless guy, foraging for cans. He also darts out into the street to beg for change from a passing car. Just when I start to wonder if I've maybe changed the channel by accident somehow, we cut back to Karla and Taylor in the car. Taylor is whining that her shirt is too scratchy, and Karla explains that it's her only clean one, and that she doesn't want to deal with Keith's "bitching" if he sees "so much as one crummy little apple juice stain." Now far be it from me to defend Angry Keith, but he did seem to take the coffee stain somewhat in stride. At least so far, that is. Regardless, Taylor's whining distracts Karla enough to take her eyes off the road, and suddenly we're treated to a rare mid-episode death scene as the homeless guy goes down like a sack of bricks. Or cans, or bottles, or whatever it is that homeless people are filling their sacks with these days. The point is that he's dead. Karla immediately slams her Volvo into reverse and high-tails it out of there.

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Six Feet Under

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