Episode Report CardDjb: F | Grade It Now!
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"He was out looking for you half the night," Mama Roam snipes as she drops her son off at school in the fancy blue family car. I guess she left first this morning so her husband got saddled with taking the thimble to work. Yes, but what about his reelection campaign? "Your father's in the middle of a reelection campaign!" Ah. Adam responds with his usual support for his father's career that he doesn't care about the election, and a tense moment ensues until Mama Roam arranges to pick Adam up after school. He has track after school. So he'll pick her up at 6:30. I'll take the bus! You will NOT take the bus! I'll pay the rent! My hero! Curses! Foiled again! Adam's grounded again, more than he was even already grounded, which is kind of a lot. Adam yells at his mother that he can't promise he's never going to see Jew-liet again, and she yells back, "I want you to think, Adam!" Another moment ticks by as the recappable moments of "moments where there is talking" and "moments where this is talking that hasn't already been talked in the short, short run of this show" hovers just near statistical zero. It's news time on L.A.'s only source of news, 810 AM: Recap Radio. Vincent Quordon (thank you, opening credits, for alerting me as to the spelling of that name and correcting my mistake last week and getting me about a billion points at Scrabble) has been arrested for torching the Midas Touch Strip Club. Roam's office has filed murder and arson charges against Quordon for the murder of Kelly Martinez, the stripper killed in the blaze and named only in her tragic death. Over on 780 AM: Just Like 810 Except Minus Thirty, we learn that Roam thanked Goldman publicly for his help in the sting. I would say that the plot was thickening, but all of this kind of happened last week and I'm left recapping the recap. When somebody finds way to go fish the script for this week's episode out of the bottom drawer, you let me know and I'll be right here. Oooh, news of Quordon's arrest made the front page of The Los Angeles Chronicle! Also known around town as "810 AM For The Deaf." Or "All the news that's fit to be fake news." I'll bet it's also made the above-the-fold front page of such regional powerhouses as The New York Gazette and The Chicago Picayune. The headline of the paper includes the word "arrest," but we cut away from it too fast to read the rest. I'd put in a call to the Chonicle's ombudsman to lodge an official complaint, but this damn "555" number just won't go through. Anyway, Roam enters his office, throws the paper down on his desk, and tells his staff of two, "Great work, everybody." Sydney from Melrose is confused and kind of a step behind, asking, "I thought the target was Larry Goldman." Sydney from Melrose is playing the unenviable role of "TiVo-Less Guy Who Forgot This Show Premiered Last Week," who forces Roam to explain -- again -- "Vincent and Goldman have a criminal history together." Roam's other adviser warns that Goldman is rich and powerful and a bad idea to go after, but Sydney (Cynthia, whatever) counterattacks, doing the hallway walk-and-talk with Roam while arguing that "what hurts you is waffling." Mmmm...waffles. She adds that Roam is finally gaining ground with voters on this whole knotty issue of "jailing the murderers," and that he can't back off now. "I don't intend to," he deadpans as response. He would then take the time to snicker malevolently, I'm sure, but I think the show just got cancelled.