Okay, good call. Skip Boogie Nights.

And now, a purely mathematical approach to any troubled domestic relationship. Crunch the numbers today!

(Father + Son) + One Game Of Basketball = Best Friends 4Eva

Roams young and old dribble the ol' pigskin (whatever, I don't know) around the driveway, calling out jaunty taunts of the "This is so easy!" and the "I may be an old man but I can still kick your ass!" variety. But, oops! Adam suggests that they should get a camera to capture what a "dork" his father is, and Roam brainstorms that the campaign commercial he's just by coincidence shooting next week should take place with the family playing basketball, rather than sitting on the couch. Adam feels like he's being used for just another photo op. Adam gets mad and rides off on his Huffy Bike, leaving Roam alone on the court to mutter "dammit." Maybe he should tell his son he's totally been banging some hot chick who used to be on Melrose Place. That's why I would say if I wanted to score some points.

Adam chats across town with Jewel-iet The Time-Life Operator. Nice headset, Customer Service. Adam complains that he's nothing more than a photo op to his father. Jew-liet complains that her parents are making her go to some extremely well-timed plot contrivance something something. Adam says he doesn't want to be in the ad. Jew-liet tells him to do it. But why? "Don't not do it because of me," she tells him. "I don't want to be the reason you hate your dad." Adam promises that he has plenty of other reasons. Like that he's short. And mean. And on a crappy TV show.

Hey, the mayor of Los Angeles looks just like Ron Silver! I would say he looks like the evil version of Ron Silver, but Ron Silver often strongly resembles the evil Ron Silver. But this mayor guy! He's...Mayor Ron Silver! Good one, don't you think?

Roam's office. Mayor Ron Silver bitches out Sydney from Melrose, telling her that she's "handicapped" Roam's campaign by making it entirely about the whole adult porny industry thing. Apparently, that was not such a good idea, exactly. Roam calls that "a load of crap," but Mayor Ron Silver just laughs in a really fey way and tut-tuts, "Tom, Tom, Tom" in a triplicate nomenclature construction that is usually reserved for the name "Judy" and spoken by fans of her in just as fey a way. Mayor Ron Silver says that Roam can't expect to put so many people on digging into Goldman "and have it remain your own private Idaho." And it's weird; I have about sixteen different cultural references for the term "your own private Idaho," and this doesn't match any of them. Because I've never seen the Gus Van Sant movie and I wouldn't like it anyway because it doesn't have the blond boy from Elephant in it, I'll go with the B-52's song of the almost-same name. But beware. I know all the words really, really well.