Clark gets down to some diaper-changing. He winces. Man of Steel, huh? Note to future supervillains: baby poo Kryptonite. Lana enters without knocking. "Clark Kent. Changing diapers like a pro," she says, smiling. There's a pro circuit for this? Clark smugly decides that this baby stuff ain't so hard. A pee fountain suddenly erupts toward him. It doesn't get him soaked, but it does put a urinary damper on Clark's enthusiasm. Lana chortles. "Nice aim, Little Guy," Clark says. Lana -- not annoying, for once -- says that they can't keep calling him "Little Guy." Well, as he grows, I'm sure more names will become self-evident. "Not-Quite-As-Small-As-Before-Guy." "Medium Guy." "Big-For-His-Age Guy." Lana says that if they don't come up with a name, they'll make fun of him when he gets to high school. I have to reshuffle the contents of my brain to encompass a world where Lana said something I actually found amusing. Clark says that since they found him in Evans Field, they can name him Evan. Wow. Shelby the dog and Evan the baby. The Kents are on a hot streak. Lana giggles that he likes it. She introduces herself and Clark to the baby, formally. I don't know if that's necessary after you've already changed someone's feces. Lana says he's the most beautiful baby, like, ever. Clark tells Lana that maybe they should take a step back. He just pooped again.
Clark walks to the living room to put the baby in a bassinette. He says that the baby's dad might still be alive. Lana trash-talks the dad for leaving. Clark says they don't know what happened; he could have bolted to get help. Lana says that maybe Evan is just an orphan, like she and Clark were. Clark uses the Blue Magnum Gaze of Sadness. Lana thinks on the interconnectedness of things, suggesting that things like this don't just happen; Clark found Evan for a reason. "We found him," Clark says. Oh, yeah, about that...there's a sale at Banana Republic, and... The lights in the house suddenly flicker. There's also wind. In the house, Clark and Lana look over at Evan. That is one magical poop, right there. It's glowing. A white light bathes the room. Lana finds comfort in Clark's abs. Bo, sensing trouble, enters the room just as the lights are fading. Big close-up on Bo. This deserves a special platitude. But Bo's mind is too blown for that. "My God," he manages. The camera moves forward on what everyone is seeing. It's a boy, maybe about five or six years old, sitting on the table. He looks like he should be on a U2 album cover. He's shivering.