Episode Report Card
Omar G: C | Grade It Now!
Zero To 60 In Three Days

Clark walks to the living room to put the baby in a bassinette. He says that the baby's dad might still be alive. Lana trash-talks the dad for leaving. Clark says they don't know what happened; he could have bolted to get help. Lana says that maybe Evan is just an orphan, like she and Clark were. Clark uses the Blue Magnum Gaze of Sadness. Lana thinks on the interconnectedness of things, suggesting that things like this don't just happen; Clark found Evan for a reason. "We found him," Clark says. Oh, yeah, about that...there's a sale at Banana Republic, and... The lights in the house suddenly flicker. There's also wind. In the house, Clark and Lana look over at Evan. That is one magical poop, right there. It's glowing. A white light bathes the room. Lana finds comfort in Clark's abs. Bo, sensing trouble, enters the room just as the lights are fading. Big close-up on Bo. This deserves a special platitude. But Bo's mind is too blown for that. "My God," he manages. The camera moves forward on what everyone is seeing. It's a boy, maybe about five or six years old, sitting on the table. He looks like he should be on a U2 album cover. He's shivering.

Commercials. Wow, lots more Star Wars commercials. Videogames. Pepsi. Ringtones. Good thing Lucas isn't selling out or anything.

Lair of Lex. We get a rare low profile view of his desk. He's got both hands above the desk. Lex is examining papers -- what look like a map and a letter. "What are you doing, son?" Papa Luthor asks as he enters. He asks if it's a new venture -- something worthy of a captain of industry. Lex says he's continuing where Papa Luthor left off, and can't talk now. Papa says they'd better talk, because Jane Seymour thinks Lex has the missing element. The Fifth Element? "The one from China," Papa clarifies. Lex leans forward and tells Papa that he's been raised to be smarter than that. He thinks Papa is using Jane as a threat. Papa tells Lex that he's there as a father who's concerned about the safety of his son. Lex is skeptical. Papa says that Jane killed Margot Kidder for an element: "Do you think she'd hesitate to do the same to you?" Lex is unfazed: "I don't have it." He adds that even if he did, he'd never trust Papa Luthor. Papa stops Lex as he starts to leave the room. If Lex was hiding the documents he was looking at, why would he leave the room and leave them lying around? Papa tells Lex that they don't have a lot of time left to spend together. Aw, that's sad. He says that Lex can spend the rest of that time being mistrustful, or he can accept that Papa Luthor is his father and loves him. I'm not sure what to make of this formerly benevolent, but now Bastardous, yet loving to his son Papa Luthor. He seems a bit mixed up, doesn't he? Lex -- who has probably heard this before -- is not convinced. He walks out of the room. Papa tells Lex as he leaves that Jane Seymour is dangerous. He asks Lex to watch his back. "I always do," Lex says, showing his back to Papa Luthor. Lex is an expert back-watcher. Just not always his own.

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