Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: C | Grade It Now!
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The Big, Gay Cold Shoulder

Al: YES! Fuck YES! You thought we were gone didn't you?
Miles: We were laying low... setting our trap... doing filthy things in the bushes while you were watching unawares.
Al: Now their love is FOREVER, bitches! We win! Go stab your eyes out if you don't like it. It took seven whole seasons, but we are the champions, my friend! No time for non-Clana-lovin' losers, 'cuz Al and Miles are the champions...
Al and Miles: OF THE... WOOOOOORLD!
Al: Suck it, fandom. We're going out on a high note. This is what it's all about. Living large and livin' Lana. PINK, OUT!
Miles: Pink out, motherfuckers. Smell ya later, haters.

I would say kill me now, but then I'd miss my summer vacation. So instead we'll just go to The Talon at night. Chloe and Jimmy are going to the apartment, but Jimmy is all freaked out about Chloe getting out of the hospital. He asks her to take it slow and wants to make sure she's all right. Jimmy offers to carry her up the stairs. Chloe says she's fine. He offers to get her some tea, but stumbles over a chair in the empty café. He offers to get her some water instead, sparkling even. He says it'll match her smile. Chloe says she just got out of ICU, but Jimmy seems to be the one with impaired motor skills right now. He is indeed spazzing out. She asks if he's all right. Jimmy stops her from walking away by saying that before tonight he never thought he would lose her, even though they've had a few breakups. He says even if they weren't together, he'd know she was happy in the world. Jimmy was shaken up by her short coma. Tinkly music plays as Jimmy tells her that she means so much to him and that he wants to spend the rest of their time on this world together. He gets down on a knee. He pulls out a little yellow and orange plastic egg? Jimmy? For real? Oh, man. Inside is a toy ring, a plastic blue gem with rhinestones around it. He says that's all they had at the hospital gift shop. But he didn't want to wait. Chloe lights up. Jimmy says they can have Breakfast at Tiffany's in the morning. He hasn't asked anything yet, but he finally does: "Will you marry me?" he asks. Just then, two men burst into the room from opposite ends. They're both wearing dark suits and have guns drawn. "Don't move!" one of them yells. Jimmy, surprised, says this isn't right. They push him aside as Chloe asks what's going on. Jimmy tries to fight, but he gets hit in the stomach and tripped so he lands on the floor, face-down. Chloe calls for Jimmy. It's agents from the Department of Domestic Security. They handcuff Chloe and place her under arrest. A third agent holds Jimmy on the floor and the two others carry Chloe away. "Jimmy, call Clark. CALL CLARK!" she yells, as she's dragged out of The Talon. Nice one, Jimmy.

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Smallville

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