Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: C | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
The Big, Gay Cold Shoulder

Teague, not making eye contact, feigns ignorance. She tells him, still with a playful tone, that for the last member of a secret society, he's not a very good liar. He looks up at her in shock. Kara tosses his glass aside, making it shatter on the floor. That'll be $6, or four private airline drink tickets. She grabs Teague and lifts him up by the neck. She wants to know where to find the device that controls The Traveler. Teague says he doesn't know. Kara punches a hole in the side of the plane with her fist. Do you know now? We see the hole from outside. It is troublesome. Inside the plane, papers are flying all around. She reminds Teague that they're 20,000 feet up. She demands to know where she can find the device. A pilot approaches Kara. She knocks him aside with her elbow and he flies across the cabin. She asks Teague one more time. With his face disturbingly close to the hole in the plane, he tells her that Lex Luthor might know. She smiles. "Enjoy the rest of your flight," she tells him. We see Kara stare at the back of the cabin. Our view changes to outside and behind the plane, we see it trailing smoke. It's not very well animated. Kara barrels through the back of the jet and it shakes and buckles. She flies, passing us on the right side. The plane breaks apart into pieces, sending a chunk of metal right at us. There will be no Made of Honor showing. Sorry. We go right to the opening credits.

Commercials. National Treasure 2: More Treasurier!

The Daily Planet, flyover. It's daytime. We are inside Lex Luthor's office. He's got his hand on a globe that has all the ocean water painted black. Foreboding, much? Lex, staring at the Arctic Circle longingly, asks his Johnny-Right-Hand if the team has reached its target. Johnny is just walking in and is still rubbing water off his hands from the bathroom. Johnny has no patience for the crummy air blowers. He says they lost contact with the team an hour ago. It seems there's very little Wi-Fi at the North Pole unless you get all the way to Santa's workshop. Johnny tries to make up bullshit excuses for the team like interference or bad weather. Lex says that according to the satellite imagery, it's clear skies over there. FAIL! Don't lie to your boss, dude. Johnny says that they were 10 miles away from the target when they lost the signal. Did you bring the signal? No, I thought you had it. Did you check your bags? Of course I checked my bag! I have three cell phones, but no signal. Oh, man, Lex is gonna be so pissed we lost his beautiful signal. Johnny tells Lex that there's no visual. Also, I sort of lost the Peterman account. Sorry, boss. My dog ate it. Lex jokes in a totally not funny way that he thought the Bermuda Triangle was somewhere more tropical. And on a whole other show. "People don't just vanish off the face of the planet!" he announces, boldly. "Find them," he says. Johnny waits a beat, as if thinking, "You gotta be shitting me, boss. It's COLD up there!" before exiting. These hands could use another washing and proper drying.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13Next

Smallville

Comments

SHARE THE SNARK

X

Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP