Smallville
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Omar G: B | Grade It Now!
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Amnesia Déjà-Vu

You guys are back after last week's episode? Wow. You people are brave.

The Talon. There's a mad, mad, mad, mad rush for coffee! It's crazy! People have got their caffeine mojo risin'. Somewhere (probably in Colombia), Juan Valdez is going, "I'm rich, bitch!" Behind the counter is Lois Lane, who is now working at The Talon and probably still living with the Kents. Check out the forward character momentum on Lois! No, really, don't, because there is none; I wouldn't want you to waste your time. Lois is completely mumbling to herself as she serves coffee, comparing herself to a free show as the overhead camera tries to peek at her cleavage, but doesn't really get much going there. Sorry, Al and Miles! We tried! Lois is attempting to say everything that runs through her mind like her coffee-slinging is avant-garde theater. She is definitely going to be Crazy Cat Lady with fifty felines in the house and brain damage from all the kitty litter when she's an old lady (like in six or seven years).

The camera smoothly comes around to settle on the back of a young man's head as he faces the coffee counter. We get a reverse angle. Scary! The young man would be handsome except he looks like a serial killer as he eyes Lois putting money into the cash register. "Oh, sweet, sweet cash register...how I want to dress you up like my ex-girlfriend and do awful things to you. Your buttons...so pliable. No! No! Must resist!" Or it could be he just wants cash. Lois sprays some whipped cream on some coffee and manages to make it muy unsexy. In a fairly smooth movement, the guy (whom we shall call Memor-X for reasons to be revealed later) goes behind the counter, grabs a muffin, tosses it from one hand to the next, and goes straight to the register. He grabs the cash from the open drawer and walks off like it ain't no thang. It is to Lois, though. She stops him: "Whoa! You did not just do that!" she posits. From where I was sitting, it looked like he totally did. He raises a hand and zaps crazy yellow-green beams at her face, which nobody in the entire crowded coffee shop happens to notice. They must really have the coffee jones bad. Green light flashes. "What can I get you?" Lois says to the thief, amiably. Holy mind control! This guy must be...Memor-X! (Ask for him by name.) The guy, wearing the signifying Hoodie of Evil, smiles and says he's already been helped. Indeed. Well played. Touché. Uh...nice pants. Lois shuts the cash drawer and goes on to the next customer. Mind taking! We don't borrow, we don't lease, we take the mind. Mind taking!

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Smallville

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