Episode Report Card
Omar G: D+ | Grade It Now!
Follow Me. Zor-Else!

Chloe just gives Lois a worried "My God, you are a dumb shit" look and walks away. Wish I could, too. Lois follows her and asks if she believes her. Chloe says the issue is whether anyone else will believe her. Nobody will. What has Lois done to prove she's worthy of any credibility in the first place? Chloe says that gossip spreads faster than a bad rash. Interesting choice of words there. Anything else we should know about Lois? Chloe says that people are going to start scratching. Chloe says that people will assume that Lois jump-started her career on her editor's Die Hard battery. Too...many...visuals. Can't process it all. Lois, also looking very tired lately, says she'll let everyone think what they want. She's not going to let water cooler gossip splash cold water on her personal life. Good luck with that line of reasoning when your dumb shit self is on the street looking for a new job. Chloe tells her she's a big girl and can do what she wants, but if she wants to be taken seriously as a reporter, she'll have to break it off before it breaks her career. And Boy Editor's desk. Lois sighs a dumb shit sigh.

Oliver's not-so-secret clock-tower headquarters. Lara is being led in by Clark, who tells her she'll be safe there while Kara is at the farm. Yeah, that really worked for Lana when you tried to use this place as a safe house last time. At this moment, my wife notices the show (which she doesn't regularly watch) and asks who that woman is. "It's Clark's mom," I tell her. "She's alive?" "Sort of. She's a clone. She was in a crystal, but they brought her back to life. Her DNA." "So she's not real?" "No, she's real...but she's sort of a clone of his dead mother." "What about his adopted mother?" I just shrug my shoulders. My wife gives me a look that confirms how crazy and stupid this episode has become.

Clark opens the doors to the balcony. Lara, who wears white and wonders where Clark and Kara got this thing for primary colors, says she wants to protect Clark. She says Zor-El can come at her. She doesn't care. Clark says that ever since he found out he was adopted, he wanted to know what his real mother was like. Notice he said "real" not "birth" mother. Somewhere in D.C., MamaKent feels a sharp pang in her heart. ["Seriously, dude, what a clunker. That's bullshit." -- Miss Alli] Clark says that now she's here, and he doesn't want to lose her. She puts her hands on his shoulders, reassuringly. "You already lost me," she says. Uh...thanks? She says his real mother died with Jor-El. Then who the fuck are you? Clark says he's not going to let anything happen to this...person. "The Kents have raised you well," she says. They both smile. Lana, meanwhile, just wanders in. Oops! Clark asks what she's doing there. Lana says Kara told her Clark might be here and might need help. Clark thinks she just wanted Lana to meet his mother. He introduces Lara. She totally died before, but it's cool. Lana says it's an honor to meet her. Clark asks Lana to stay with his mother. Ooh. Awkward. Thanks for nothing, Clark. He says he has to meet up with Kara. Lana is like, "Oh, sure...let me go...make some CHINA! (Running away) Woob woob woob woob woob!" Lara wants to give something to Clark. It's a big silver ring on a chain. It has a dark blue jeweled stripe. It was Jor-El's. It was his victory ring, given to him when he became a member of the council. Ignore the logo for Drama Club; that was just a phase. Lara says it's Kryptonian tradition to pass the ring on to the first-born son when he comes of age. Clark will have to do. Clark puts the ring on his right hand ring finger. It glows briefly. Clark's eyes also flash bright blue. Lara asks if he's all right. "Yeah. I think so," he says.

Clark emerges downstairs in an alley, and Zor-El is already there, calling out to him. Zor-El is standing way up on a weird walkway between two buildings. "Of course, Jor-El's son!" he says. It's more dramatic up here! And more of the audience can see me, even from the cheap seats! Clark turns, but Zor-El is now standing behind him. Zor-El says Clark has the same devious look in his eye. Want to do some improv exercises? Clark asks how he found him. "Kara told me," he says. Zor-El says Kara only wants what's best for the House of El and is waiting at the Fortress. He says they're going to begin their mission to save the Kryptonian race.

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