Lex comes up to Dropkick, who is looking a'mighty fine herself. He kisses her on the cheek and apologizes for being late. She asks where he's been. Lex says he's all hers now. Oh, but he needs a quick moment with the best man. A quickie? Lex goes up to Clark and his folks and kisses MamaKent on the cheek. She says that everything is beautiful. She's only looking at Lex, but she's right anyway. Lex and Bo shake hands. Lex asks for a word with their son. Lex fills Clark in, near the bar, about Professor Snideface. Lex tells Clark that Snideface was ranting about him. Lex tells Clark that, according to the cave drawings, Clark is going to rule the world. Clark does a nice job feigning amusement. "He's obviously nuts," Clark says. Lex agrees, but says that Papa Luthor was there. Lex says Papa Luthor quoted one of his favorite Elizabethan poets: "Twixt truth and madness lies but a sliver of a stream." Lex warns Clark that Papa Luthor isn't going to let things drop.
Torch. Poor Chloe is looking at digital photos on her computer of last year's season-ending Spring Formal. Remember when Chloe actually had a reason to be happy about something? "I certainly do admire your work ethic, Miss Sullivan," we hear a voice say. I sure hope Papa Luthor is deducting mileage for all this traveling he's doing this week. Chloe scrolls from her "C.K." folder to "Feature (Torch)." There's also a "Bloodwork" folder, just in case you were wondering. Chloe says she wasn't invited to the rehearsal dinner. Instead of her iMac, Chloe now has a nice, big flat-panel monitor and...oh my God, did I call this or what in a previous recap: An ALIENWARE computer! Go Chloe! Unreal Tournament 2k3 party at The Torch! Papa Luthor says that he and Chloe have a lot in common. Papa Luthor tells Chloe that he spoke to the managing editor of The Daily Planet, and Chloe is set up to write a weekly column on current affairs from a young perspective. Papa Luthor runs his hand along the nice, green Alienware computer (as I surely would). As we move around, we see that the main headline for the next issue of the newspaper: "Ferrets found in air ducts!" Now would those be Clark's ducts or Lex's? Chloe is aglow. Chloe thanks Papa Luthor. He says that's reward enough, but, oh, by the way, he needs Chloe to do a complete investigative profile on Clark Kent. Chloe asks what The Daily Planet would want with that profile. Papa Luthor says it's not for them. It's for himself. He suggests that Chloe combine it with any research she already has about Clark's family. Chloe does a long take, gets up, and lashes out. She can't believe she fell for it, and let down her journalistic guard. You know the drill. Papa Luthor says she's playing in the real world and she has to give to get. He runs a finger along the top of that nice green Alienware monitor with the alien head logo on the front. Chloe leans forward and tells Papa Luthor he can shove his job offer down his thousand-dollar pants. Papa Luthor, the withered, says that Clark is very lucky to have a friend like Chloe. "All that integrity," he says. He tells Chloe that if Clark had to make a choice, he wonders if Clark would sacrifice his dream out of loyalty to Chloe. Yeah. Doubt it. I love you, Chloe, but you just made a dumb decision. And I think she just realized it.