Calling (1)

Episode Report Card
Omar G: B | Grade It Now!
Snideface: The Revenge

The door swings open and Snideface walks in. "I did it, Lex," Snideface says, triumphantly. Snideface says he finally read the wall and knows what it says. Lex tries to shut him up by saying that they'll talk about it later. Papa Luthor also moves forward with interest. Lex tells Papa Luthor to stay out of it. Papa persists. "The last son will rule the planet," Snideface says, snidely. "Don't you see?" Snideface asks. "It's Clark Kent." Papa Luthor and Lex exchange a look. Lex says that's a pretty big leap. And a pretty big hunk of man. Snideface says he's never seen more clearly in his life, and he knows what has to be done. Jenga! "We have to kill Clark Kent," Snideface says. He's sweating a bit. "Before he destroys us all." Might I suggest a substitution? Have you thought about killing Lana instead? Lex says that Snideface is confused. Snideface holds his palm up at Lex, and Lex gets scared. Suddenly, Snideface falls. The Jr. Doctor has shot him with a tranquilizer dart. Nice aim, dude. Everybody exchanges significant looks.

Commercials. Shakira, stop. Seriously. Just. Stop.

Clark is in the Fortress of Toastitude. He's up in the loft, wearing a blue shirt, tie, and khakis, and trying to figure out what the hell to say at Lex's rehearsal dinner. Chloe comes up underneath him in the barn's lower level. She's amused and says, "The first line is always the hardest." So's the first $20 million. She tells Clark the news about Professor Snideface. Chloe asks if Clark wants to come out of journalistic retirement and help her with the story. Clark says he appreciates the offer, but now's not a good time. He gestures with his little blue paper to make the point. Chloe says she didn't mean right now. Well then, when? Next month when the story's old? Chloe smiles and says she wishes things could be like they were. Before or during the time when she's been a total doormat? Clark says he wishes that, too. Chloe says she feels like there's a huge rift between them (Lana the Rift), and that she can't get back to Clark. Clark says it'll happen; they just need some time. Chloe asks if they can just promise to be honest with each other. She says she's a big girl and Clark's a big boy and she thinks they can handle it. Clark doesn't look very happy about this whole "telling the truth" thing. Chloe excuses herself. She says Clark has a rehearsal dinner and she has The Torch. She tells him to break a leg. Oh, but he can't.

Rehearsal diner. Lots of fine-looking dressy people partying. Even MamaKent and Bo Duke are wearing their social best. Lana is wearing a pink outfit that doesn't necessarily suck. Clark is hanging with his parents, but watching Lana intently. He cleans up nicely. "I fly so high," the alt-crap rock plays in the background. Lana notices Clark watching her, and they exchange a look.

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