Smallville

Episode Report Card
Tippi Blevins: B- | 1792 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Kneel Before Tess

Back at the TV studio, Clark is sadly turning off the monitors. Producer lady compliments him on a great job. "Have you seen the new marketing ad?" she asks. She shows him a life-size cut-out of him and Lois, posed back-to-back. Lois looks like a Vargas pinup girl, all arched back and flirtatious smiles, while Clark looks like he's waiting for the bus. "I have high hopes for you two," the producer lady says. Sad music plays. "So did I," Clark says under his breath.

Back in the alley, Oliver has just been thrown to the ground. Mia protests to Rick: "You said you wouldn't hurt him!" And you believed him? Rick is marching Lois through the alley, his gun at her back. Lois snarks to Mia: "Tell me you didn't pick Prince Charming here over Oliver." Rick tells her to shut up. Lois spins around and punches Rick, somehow miraculously not getting shot for her troubles. She knocks Rick to the ground. His thug pals join in and wrestle Lois into submission. In the process, her earpiece falls out and is activated when it hits the ground. Rick levels his gun at Lois. Mia kicks his wrist, sending the gun flying high into the air. She catches it and aims at Rick. "I can't let you do this," she says. "Streetwalker thinks she's a street fighter," Rick says. He snatches the gun away from Mia when she hesitates. He hits her and she falls to the ground, unconscious, even though she took a much more severe beating in that fighting ring earlier. By this time, Oliver has come to and joins the fight. He takes on Pimpy Rick while Lois starts fighting the two thugs. When they go down, Lois and Oliver make a run for it. Pimpy Rick whips out a machine gun and starts firing, but somehow doesn't hit them. Clark hears the ruckus via Lois's fallen earpiece and superzips out of the studio.

Lois and Oliver decide to abandon all common sense to run up some stairs and onto the roof. Pimpy Rick catches up to them and shoots. Oliver makes a grunting sound like he's been shot, but maybe it's just a sound of frustration. Realizing they've been cornered, Oliver holds Lois close, trying to shield her form Rick. She buries her face in Oliver's chest. I guess if you have to die, it's a nice thing to see before you go. Pimpy Rick shoots and several bullets fly out in extra super slo-mo CGI. Clark shows up to stand between the bullets and Oliver, allowing them to hit him in the chest. He uses his heat vision to obliterate more bullets and the gun, but one bullet escapes him and makes its way toward Oliver. Still in extra super slow "bullet time", Clark plucks the bullet out of the air just before it reaches Oliver's face. Time resumes its normal pace and Rick's gun explodes, knocking him back. Clark spends several long moments glaring at Oliver, because now is the perfect time to let him know just how pissed you are that Lois seemingly chose him over you. Fool is lucky she still has her face buried in Oliver's chest. Finally, he zips away and Lois looks up at Oliver, realizing they're still alive. They embrace. Clark watches from a rooftop some distance away, his mood as dark as his Emo Blur outfit.

Smallville

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