Episode Report Card
admin: B | Grade It Now!

BB tells the sad story of how he was in the car with his family when they were in a horrific car accident in the middle of a snow storm. It was him, his sister, his mom: "My pops." BB may be one of the best guest stars this show has ever had, at least in terms of acting. "I should have died with them," BB says, sadly. Bionic Brother says that he passed out, expecting to see some angels the next time he awoke. I get that same feeling all the time, only it's Victoria's Secret angels. Instead, he ended up with a bunch of "Cyntechnics Scientists." BB says that he was one of several dead guys pulled from accidents for experiments, but that he was the first one who survived. He says that if not for a doctor who helped him escape, he'd be more machine than man right now. Judging from Clark's full-body eye scan, it looks like that already happened. Clark asks if he's talking about all the metal in his body. BB gives him the stink-eye. He asks how Clark knows what's in him. Uh...very thorough eye exam? BB asks why Clark's not hurt after being tossed against that hospital wall. "You're not the only one who drinks a lot of milk," Clark says, giving him a look that is so wholesome, yet dirty (and which goes with a line that is similarly wholesome and dirty) that it is clearly the Gayest Look of the Episode. Have some milk, boys. BB asks if Clark is bionic, too. Clark says he's just "different." Differently able?

BB has questions, but apparently asking more about Clark isn't one of them. BB asks if Lana is all right with Clark being whatever he is. "Lana doesn't know," Clark says. BB brings up his girl, Katherine. He shows Clark a photo. "She's beautiful," Clark says. Bionic Brother says that they were planning on getting married after high school. "Some wedding that'd be now," he says. Oh, like anyone can tell you're more Black & Decker than black. Clark asks if Katherine knows he's alive. "No," says BB, heartbroken. "I don't want to see her." He doesn't think she'd accept what happened to him: "How could she ever love a thing like me?" Some women know...machinery. Clark -- also falling into the self-pity quicksand -- says that he's not the best person to ask about that. He hands back the photo. BB stares at it. He says it won't matter when the soldiers catch up with him. Clark offers some help in the form of his reporter friend, Chloe. Clark thinks they can get info on the bad guys and help get them off BB's back. "You'd do that for me?" Bionic Brother asks. Clark says that he has this thing about being experimented on in labs. He thinks it's so hot. Clark tells BB to sit tight while he goes to investigate. "Wide receiver." "Sit tight." Wow. They're laying it on thick here.

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