Smallville
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Omar G: B- | Grade It Now!
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Subject: Your Imminent Death

Quick cut to The Daily Planet. He's calling Chloe about the Summerholt story. He says by gum she's got something here! Stop the presses! The closed captioning has Chloe warning him that somebody's going to kill him, but in the actual episode we don't hear her voice. The office assistant picks up a pencil. She sharpens it. Max tells Chloe that he appreciates the heads-up. The editor asks if the assistant needs anything. Cut to Chloe at the other end of the line. Pencil stab! Chloe loses Max. His arm slumps. The assistant starts screaming. "Max! No!" We pull back to reveal Max, dead on the desk, a pencil in his ear. Where's our inside-the-ear CGI shot of that?

Commercials. iPods are cool, we know. Breakdancing isn't going to make them any cooler.

The office of Lex (the home version). He leads in Chloe and Clark as our superhero thanks him for letting Chloe stay over. Doesn't Lex have email, too? Lex pours some orange juice while Chloe says that it's the last place anyone would look for her. I'll ask again: doesn't Lex have email? I thought Chloe's physical location wasn't the point. Lex apologizes to Chloe for what happened to her editor. "You must have really had Garner over a barrel," Lex observes. Chloe says she's picked up a nasty habit of not knowing what she's getting herself into lately. Lex sums up the story by suggesting that Evil Doc has turned Lisa Loeb into his personal "email assassin." Clark says it's not much of a stretch (oh really?): Summerholt goes from studying the brain to controlling it. We'll make trillions! Better yet, we'll make millions! Lex kinda admires the breakthrough. Chloe says that when it comes to brainwarping, Evil Doc is the guy. Clark announces that he's going to talk to the doctor. Chloe tries to stop him, but Clark is going anyway. He advises Chloe not to leave the mansion. Even if Lex tries to kill her. Lex, wearing a nice, tight blue button-up shirt, says his tech guys are trying to track down Lisa Loeb, and that he's going to see what they've found. He tells her to make herself at home. Feel free to go to the Scrooge McDuck room and roll around in the piles of cash.

Metropolis. Summerholt. Clark puts a lot of miles on a truck that doesn't even work right now. Clark enters the lobby. He happens to arrive just as Evil Doc is leaving. "Clark Kent. Here to abduct another of my patients?" asks Doc. He says that security has been upped quite a bit since Clark's last visit. Clark says he knows what Evil Doc and Lisa Loeb are doing. Evil Doc acts like he doesn't know who Clark means at first, and then says she left the institute months ago. Clark says, amusingly, that sending mind-control emails isn't the kind of skill you pick up at Radio Shack. You do learn a lot about batteries and RF converters there, though. Evil Doc denies that Summerholt has anything to do with that. Clark grabs the dude by the arm as he tries to walk past, and says that the girl has already killed one reporter and is going after another. Evil Doc tells "Mr. Kent" that he works at a serious research institute, and that he's not going to involve his business in some imaginary high-school fantasy. Clark threatens to bring in the police. And tell them what? Security guards approach. Evil Doc asks them to show Clark the door. Why? It's right there and, oh...he meant throw Clark out. They do. As Clark is led out, he spots the Evil Doc dialing his cell phone. Clark focuses his new superhearing ability as we go inside his ear canal to watch the magic of his medulla earlongatta and his MC Hammer vibrate against the Pregnant Lady Gland in glorious CGI. Clark hears the whole phone conversation, including the apartments and apartment number where Lisa Loeb is living.

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Smallville

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