Episode Report Card
Omar G: B- | Grade It Now!
Subject: Your Imminent Death

MAPP alert. Poor Man's Wes Bentley is in a hospital room, packing up his stuff into a worn green bag. Lana walks in and asks if he's leaving. "Parole. Good behavior," he says. She asks in a teasing voice if he's going back to Metropolis. He says he's sort of thinking about staying in Smallville. "Why?" asks Lana. He goes, "Ow. That hurt." Lana just meant that the town doesn't seem like his type of place, considering he can go anywhere. He says it's the closest thing to home he has. And he wants to spend some more time with a coffee-shop owner who has "the most beautiful eyes [he's] ever seen." He gets up close and puts his hands on Lana's face. She turns all wiggy and says they don't know each other very well. In the name of all that is holy, I demand that this scene end soon! He asks if that wasn't the point of his staying. He asks what the problem is. Lana turns and says that no one knows martial arts without knowing where they learned it. She says he hacks computers better than Chloe. And if he got all that from book learnin', where are the books? Nobody retains knowledge! Freak! "Wow," he says. He tells Lana that Clark must have really messed with her head. Lana agrees, and says she won't let it happen again. PM'sWB gets pissy. He says he likes Lana, but that he's not going to stick around to become one of Lana's problems. You tell 'er! Lana looks hurt. Good. He tells her she should go. Wow, double whammy. Lana leaves. Then she stops in the hall and turns back so that we can see her face. Too much! It's too much! Gaaaahhh, damn you Smallville! Damn you straight to hell!

The Torch. Chloe is there late at night. She's reading something, and Clark scares her. She tells him not to sneak up on her like that. Clark says he talked to Lex (is that all?), and they found her computer. Unfortunately, the hard drive was missing. Chloe moans that all her email addresses are gone. Clark shows her a photo and says it's who they think stole it. Lisa Loeb. We should have known. Chloe knows the woman. The connection isn't Papa Luthor -- it's a story on Summerholt Chloe was working on after the Luka incident. Clark makes the connection. Chloe says that Luka wasn't the only patient who had been held there against his will. Clark says, and I'm not making this up, "Well, his methods are right out of the Mengele handbook." Right. Seventeen-year-olds say shit like that all the time. Even superpowered ones. Clark asks why Lisa Loeb was there. Chloe says she was recruited by MIT at fifteen, and was an engineering whiz kid. I was told by an alert reader that MIT never recruits anyone. So here's your shout-out, MIT alumnus Janice. Lisa Loeb was sent to Summerholt after she went homicidal on another student. Clark says it's not a psych ward. Chloe says it is, for megalo-braniacs. "Why would she want to kill you?" Clark asks. Chloe says that when she interviewed Lisa Loeb, the girl was convinced that Evil Doc had helped change her life. Chloe says she had enough ammo in the article to shut them down. Clark asks who else knows about the article. "Max," says Chloe.

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