Smallville
Smallville

Episode Report Card
Omar G: B | 528 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Buzzkill

Lex cranes his neck and pulls over. He gets out of the car and starts dialing his cell phone. He tells the woman that she looks like she needs help. It would be so funny if she got up and it was Papa Luthor. The woman says no thanks, but Lex is already telling "Hans," his mechanic, where he's at. The woman -- who appears to be wearing a lace something or other under a red power suit -- seems annoyed by Lex. She looks and sounds as though she has a cold. She says she appreciates Lex's "postmodern chivalry," but she's fine. You know, it's not really chivalry when your ass is hanging out of your skirt as thanks. "A vocabulary and Dolce & Gabbana," Lex says. So. Gay. Just admit it, already, fashion-puss. He says she has Metropolis written all over her. Probably in very slutty lipstick colors. She makes some noise about Lex being the sheriff there to run her out of town. Lex asks whether her attitude came as an accessory to the couture. See? He did it again! The Woman in Red says she's thinking of moving to Smallville, but that Lex doesn't look like a local. Lex says he's been there since last fall. So it's been a year? Fuck this "season" shit. He says the town is starting to grow on him. Like a fungus. Among us. She asks what the appeal is. Lex says that the town is deceptive, and nothing is what it seems. She asks why. Lex suddenly says, "All these questions. This is beginning to sound like an interview." Red Lady looks busted. Lex reaches into her car and turns the keys; the engine comes on just fine. Maybe she was just checking her windshield wiper fluid. Lex asks who she's working for. She feigns confusion. Lex says he's going to throw her keys into the woods. Lex starts to throw. She catches his hand. She says she's Karen Castle, a staff reporter for the Metropolis Journal. Metropolis has how many newspapers? Sheesh. Lex gives back the keys and says he doesn't grant interviews. He says he's spent the better part of his life taking back entrances in order to avoid people like her. Would "people like her" be women, and one of those back entrances be "Clark"? ReporterHo follows Lex, holding her little pink rag, and says she wants to write an article about Lex -- a serious one that doesn't paint him as a wild child or Papa Luthor's supplicant son. She says that her paper is more serious than that tabloid, The Inquisitor, and that an article would mean more in her rag. Lex considers it. She says she'll do a cover profile that will help him crawl out from his father's shadow. I don't know about that shadow. Have you seen Papa Luthor's hair? She smiles. Lex says he appreciates the offer, but declines. Smile fades. "You get points for style, though," Lex says. Lex gets in his car and zooms off. ReporterHo stands in the street, holding a wrench, legs apart, and staring after that sexy, unattainable hunk of bald man.

Smallville

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