Episode Report Card
Omar G: B- | Grade It Now!

Pete's storage shed at night. Hamilton is taking the place apart. Pete walks in on him. Hamilton shines a light on Pete and asks about the missing piece. "You're the one who stole the spaceship?" Pete asks. Pete recognizes Hamilton. Hammy grabs Pete and throws him flat against the wall. Pete lets slip that the ship belongs to someone much stronger than Hammy. "You know who it belongs to," Hamilton says, all scary and violent now. Pete tries to backtrack. He moves to get away, but Hammy clocks him on the head with the flashlight. Ow. Commercials! More ow!

Kent kitchen at night. Bo's been online (cow porn!) looking at newspaper sites, police sites, even UFO sites, and he can't find anything about the spaceship. He walks in carrying a coffee mug with little cows on it! Seriously! MamaKent fills the mug up, dutifully. Bo talks about Bubba, and how he spoke to Pete before he died. Maybe he told Pete something that could help. Clark says he can't talk to Pete about it. He tells his folks about the fight, and how he revealed his superpowers. Bo freaks out. He tells Clark he could have spoken to them first before blabbing his insouciant lips about it. Clark says he flat-out didn't want to come up with another lie. Worriedly, MamaKent says she hopes Pete at least won't tell anyone else. Clark says he's not sure, since Pete's so upset. The phone rings. It's Pete's parents, looking for Pete.

Talon. The sign outside at night now reads, "Smallville's Best Cappuccino." It's not exactly like watching the clever stuff they put at the beginning of every Simpsons episode. Nasty Nell is at a table with Lana, who is pouring tea out of what looks like a Neti Pot. Nell says it's a wonderful idea for them to do this, since they haven't spent much time alone since the introduction of Polo Shirt into their lives. Lana starts to talk about Dean in flattering terms, "But..." Nell picks up on the vibe and surmises that Lana wanted the damn tables where they are. Nell says she already talked to her beau about Lana being independent. Nell says she wants the three of them to spend more time as a family. "Family," Lana repeats, conjuring up images of runaway meteors. Nell also reveals a mini-bombshell: she and Polo Shirt are getting married! Way to move along the subplot, Nell. Lana doesn't seem entirely thrilled.

Hamilton's anything-but-love shack. Pete is tied up. You know, if I were an S&M expert, I might be able to examine in detail why this show ties people up or pins them down in some way in nearly every episode. Hamilton is on a tear, wanting to know whom the ship belongs to. Pete says he was just fronting with his inflated ego, and doesn't know whom the ship belongs to. Hamilton's hand is doing the hokey-pokey part where you shake it all around. Pete notices and says that Hammy is sick. Pete says he'll go get help. A jitter specialist or something. Hamilton says that even the doctors don't know what's killing him. Hamilton, insanely, says he's going to prove he's not some sideshow freak -- a quack who sells rocks on the side of the road. Maybe instead, he could be the guy who lives in a van down by the river. I think that's a tiny step up, sociologically speaking. Hamilton says that if Pete doesn't tell him what he wants to know, he'll die, too. He slaps his own forehead and then slaps Pete's. Pete looks disgusted.

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