Episode Report Card
Omar G: B- | Grade It Now!

Music finishes up as we pan down from the sky to the cornfield where Poor Bubba's van is still overturned. Pete and Clark walk past it. Pete amusingly makes dramatic sounds as he parts the stalks and shows Clark the ship. Clark is flattened and floored. He asks where Pete thinks it came from. "Clark, it's a spaceship. What the hell else would it be?" Pete asks, as if he's speaking to classroom full of slow children. Clark says that it could be a specialty aircraft or a downed Russian satellite. Pete says it's way extra-terrestrial. Clark tries to play it off: he says there's probably little green guys running around the cornfields, too. Grasshoppers? Pete asks if Clark's ever seen anything like it. Clark makes a frowny face. He asks Pete if the aliens came to Earth, why they'd go to Smallville. Because of the Talon's world-class cappuccino? Pete mentions cattle mutilations (poor Bo!) and crop circles; he says the aliens would be like kids in a candy store here. Would that make Lex parfait? Pete tries to get Clark to help him lift the ship. I'm still annoyed that the authorities investigating a car accident didn't notice an alien craft four feet over. Clark asks whether Pete's just going to take the ship. Pete cockamamies that he was questioned by the sheriff; he said he couldn't remember where the truck went off the road, but he's sure the cops will be back. Doesn't. Explain. A. Thing. I hear a crow cawing as Pete and Clark start to move the ship. Man, this is boring. Clark offers to take the ship to his house. Pete stops him and says that Bo Duke will take the craft to the authorities. That, or he'll live an entire life in secret, shielding all from the awesome secret in his basement. Pete testily tells Clark that they're taking it to his house. Clark insists. Pete smacks down, reminding Clark that he found the ship, not Clark. Losers weepers, Clark. Clark finally acquiesces and even pretends to struggle to move the heavy ship.

Magnificent Bastard Castle. Lex does what he always does alone: gears up a fresh drink. He's so spoiled he can't even pick up ice cubes with his hand. He has to use tongs. Papa Luthor and a helper walk in. Papa is wielding a blind man's cane and dark glasses. He calls out for Lex, who looks as if he's just the most burdened rich boy in the world. Lex says he wasn't expecting his dad. Papa Luthor brushes off his Asian helper-boy's attempt to take off his coat. That's not what you were doing earlier, sir. "Get out," Papa Luthor tells the poor boy. The next time some rich, blind, bearded guy walks into his Ping Pong club in Bangkok, that boy is going to think better about signing on for lifetime servitude. Lex leads his dad over by the elbow, remarking that the doctors say the recovery is going well. As he struggles (overly struggles, I think) to sit down, Papa haltingly says that he's doing so well, he was told to take a break from his physical therapy. Something smells. Oh, yes -- a lie! Papa says the doctor told him that getting away from the stress of Metropolis might help him. This is such a setup for a heartwarming father/son sitcom. Who can we get for this? Alfred Molina? Randy Quaid? Lex asks why Papa Luthor decided to come there. Papa says it was for some father/son bonding. Oh, he means the bonding where they're glued together and locked in a gritty battle for their lives? Papa Luthor takes off his glasses and seems to react to the daylight coming in through the windows. Then he dabs under his eye with a handkerchief. I still say he's faking. Lex asks how long Papa's staying. "A few days. Maybe a week," says Papa Luthor. Lex asks whether the beach house might not be better. The MTV beach house? Yeeeeee-aaaaah! Lex says that the sea air might be invigorating. First, who says "invigorating" except our dads after a jog? And how is salty air going to help somebody's painful, blind eyes? Papa Luthor says he feels like Lex doesn't want him there. Did you see the girl Lex was dating last week? And the farmboy? You're gonna cramp his style! Lex calls his dad "Father" and says he just wants what's best for Papa Luthor. New eyeballs? Lex tells him to stay as long as he likes. Given that Papa Luthor imported the castle himself, stone by stone, that's generous, Lex.

Previous 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13Next





Get the most of your experience.
Share the Snark!

See content relevant to you based on what your friends are reading and watching.

Share your activity with your friends to Facebook's News Feed, Timeline and Ticker.

Stay in Control: Delete any item from your activity that you choose not to share.

The Latest Activity On TwOP