Smallville

Episode Report Card
Tippi Blevins: B- | 3 USERS: A
YOU GRADE IT
Bed & Breakfast & Banshee

McDougal Inn. Clark and Chloe follow the innkeeper inside, having apparently already explained their crazy theory to her. "Look," she says, "the legend of Siobhan McDougal is just a ghost story!" Clark points out that there's a "confused co-ed" in the inn's living room and a dead body outside. He wants to hear the rest of Siobhan's story. The innkeeper clearly thinks they're nuttier than a pecan harvest but humors them with the tale. She was killed and her soul was sent to the underworld, where she was given powers, like "uncommon strength" and the ability to kill men with her wailing. The innkeeper goes on: "The superstitious villagers also gave her a new name: the Silver Banshee." "OK, the last time I checked, the underworld was still underground," Chloe says. Really? You checked up on the underworld? She wants to know how Siobhan escaped. The innkeeper McExposits about a legendary portal created in Siobhan's image. Bevan, fearing for his life, covered the relic with Siobhan's blood to seal the portal. Clark remembers he's in the scene and pipes up: "A relic in her image? Like a statue, or an engraving?" Chloe somehow comes to the conclusion that it's a painting. They all turn toward Uncle Bevan's portrait. Clark uses his X-ray vision and sees that underneath that painting, there's another canvas bearing Siobhan's image. Chloe goes over to the painting, touching the tear in the canvas and brings the whole boring thing full circle: "And then Lois must have accidentally opened the portal when she scraped it." Clark tasks Chloe with figuring out how to close the portal while he goes off to find Siobhan. The innkeeper looks on as Chloe takes a letter opener from the front desk and cuts away at the top canvas. Siobhan's face, as it comes to light, flashes and glows.

Back in the woods, a possessed Lois is tossing Oliver around a bit more. As he rolls to the ground, she throws her arms wide and sheds Lois's body in a flash of light. That's... very dumb. It's not as if she had just been shape-shifting to look like Lois -- she was actually in Lois. Then, suddenly, Siobhan is standing there and Lois is totally vanished. Also, the Silver Banshee makeup/costume is dreadful. She's got panda-black eye makeup and this wild mullet hair and a body stocking that looks like she made it in underworld Home Ec. [Sadly, that's comic-accurate. - Z] Then she starts to speak in an echo-y Irish/Scottish/crap accent: "I was denied vengeance just as I was denied power, but now I shall have both!" Oliver, echoing my fashion sense, makes fun of her hair. She screams at him. The "wail" effect looks almost exactly like the "subsonic scream" effect they use for Black Canary. Oliver clutches his ears and passes out. Clark appears in the woods behind Oliver and calls her name. She stops screaming long enough to regard this handsome intruder. Clark says he knows her story: "But killing men won't make up for what was done to you!" "Maybe not," she says, "but it does make me feel better." She grins at him, exposing a mouthful of rotted teeth. If the wailing doesn't kill you, the halitosis surely will. She lets loose a scream at Clark, who super-zips into the sound wave's path and blasts it with his heat-vision. That's right, he fights sound with fire. It works about as well as you would expect, which is to say not at all and the force of the wail sends him hurtling backwards. He lands on his back with a grunt.

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Smallville

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